


This is Only Temporary

by WatchAndLearnKid



Category: Banana Bus Squad
Genre: M/M, NSFW
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-07
Updated: 2018-09-07
Packaged: 2019-07-08 06:34:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 27,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15924863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WatchAndLearnKid/pseuds/WatchAndLearnKid
Summary: I will be posting my awful NSFW fics that I had previously removed here for a limited time for your enjoyment. -walk





	1. Favors

Evan hated himself. He was sitting in a booth in the breakfast joint on the corner, alone. Because he couldn't decide whether or not to run down the sidewalk after a certain someone or just let all the things that had transpired between them over the last three weeks fade away.

  
What had happened had his knees weak just thinking about it. It had his fingers trembling against his coffee cup. He could feel the sweat trying to bead on the back of his neck. Those weeks came flooding back to him in painfully vivid detail and he couldn't push it away.

\------

  
"Dude, just stay here. I need someone to watch the X-Files with anyway." Evan grinned up at Delirious until he groaned and gave in like he usually did.

"Fine." He tossed his jacket on the sofa and flopped down beside him, stretching out. "But you gotta give me some of your pajamas, because I usually just sleep naked. I doubt you wanna see that laying here on your couch when you wake up in the morning."

Evan laughed, "Just sleep in your briefs. You don't have to sleep fully clothed. I'm not gonna go blind or lose my sanctity and innocence from seeing you half naked. This isn't a sleep over in elementary school."

Delirious giggled and slid down the couch until his shoulder was leaning on Evan's. By the end of the night he was fast asleep, his face smushed against Evan's arm, breathing deeply. Evan was about to say something about aliens, but looked down and saw him passed out. He grinned to himself and kept watching the show until he couldn't hold his eyes open and he let his head fall back on the couch.

They woke sprawled out on the couch together, Jonathan using Evan's thigh as a pillow. It wasn't weird, they simply stretched, grinned at each other, then shuffled sleepily into the kitchen for food.

Evan told him to stay a little longer. "Just a few more days. You can book a different flight."

Jonathan simply smiled and said, "Okay."

So he stayed, cancelled his flight home, and stuck by Evan's side as he entertained him while he had him in his company.

He showed him the sights, played games with him side by side for the first time. They had a great time together. The space between them or lack thereof did nothing but strengthen their bond. It was like they'd never been apart. Evan didn't want him to go, he made the perfect roommate and he felt the guilt weighing him down when he saw Delirious on his phone arguing with someone at home.

Jonathan gave him a sad smile and shook his head when be hung up on them. "Sorry."

Evan sighed, "I'm the one that's sorry, I'm keeping you from home."

"I want to be here, it's not your fault." Jonathan giggled. "It's just my mom bitching. She's getting tired of watching my dog while I'm gone. But it's fine, I told her Luke was coming to get the rabid beast."

"Oh. Okay." Evan nodded, uncertain. "Do you need to go?"

"Do I need to? _Probably_." Jonathan smirked. "But do I want to? _No_."

Evan let a smile slowly pull at his lips. "Wanna go get some dinner?"

"Yes. I'm starving." Jonathan licked his lips and slipped into his jacket. Evan followed him out and they took the stairs because the elevator was out of service for repairs. He hated taking the stairs.

Then something happened that made him hate it even more. As soon as Jonathan pushed the door open to the stairwell, it knocked into another person. A drunk person who caught himself and glared at them. "You got a fucking problem?!"

Jonathan looked at him like he was stupid, "No, clearly we were just going down the stairs. No one is out to get you, I promise. Do you need a hand, dude? I can smell the vodka on you from here."

That didn't sit well with the guy and before Evan could stop him, the man grabbed a handful of Jonathan's shirt and shoved him. Evan grabbed for him but he was too late and he watched him fall back down the steps, hearing the snap and his pained yell when Jonathan tried to catch himself with his hands. Evan ran after him when he hit the bottom and came to a stop, gasping, holding his right hand to his chest.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." He mumbled and Evan could see his eyes watering when he fell to his knees beside him.

"Shit! Okay, are you okay?!"

He shook his head, "My hands. Think I broke em. Jesus fuck."

Evan swallowed and looked back up the staircase, but the guy was nowhere to be seen. He cursed and tried his best to get Jonathan to his feet without hurting him further. He helped him down the last flight of stairs and held his phone to his other ear.

"Yeah, I need an ambulance."

\------

  
"So, my left hand is sprained and my right is broken?" Jonathan asked miserably.

The doctor nodded, "Yes and we're going to put both of them in a cast just for extra measure. You need to keep your left still just as much as your right."

Jonathan's head hit the back of the seat and he groaned. "God."

Evan was bouncing his foot nervously and guiltily as he sat in the chair next to him and he let the apologies spill when the doctor left to go get everything set up. "Jonathan, I am so fucking sorry. If I had just let you leave the first time you never would've been in that stairwell."

Despite all the pain he was in Jonathan turned his head in his direction and gave him a stupid grin, "Seriously, stop apologizing for something that was never your fault. Like I told you before, I wanted to stay. This just means I should stay even longer."

Evan glanced up hopefully. "Yeah?"

"Yeah, I'm no use going anywhere if I can't use my hands, right?" Jonathan smiled knowingly.

Evan nodded quickly, "Right. I swear I'll do my best, I'll take care of anything and everything while your hands get better. You can even have my bed."

Jonathan laughed, "No, that's too much, man. I'll be fine on the couch."

He slept for the first day after he got his cast and a good dose of pain medication in his system. Evan had forced him into his bedroom and made him sleep in his bed instead of the couch. Jonathan didn't fight it when he was high as a kite and compliant, but when he woke with a splitting headache he was more than irritable. He groaned and slid his legs over the edge of the bed and sat up, trying to rub at his eyes but he hit himself upside the head with his casts.

"God dammit!" He sighed dejectedly and fell back onto the bed, jolting when he felt his head hit something soft and warm and grumbly.

"Ow!" Evan complained and rubbed at his stomach.

Jonathan raised a tired brow at him, "Why am I in your bed? What did you do to me last night? Am I pregnant?"

Evan rubbed at his messy hair and smiled up at him, "What? No. You kept complaining about how it was too quiet in here and you couldn't sleep so I stayed and talked to you about old cartoons until you shut up and fell asleep."

"Rocko's Modern Life?" Jonathan squinted in the light.

"Yes and Doug, Kim Possible, and Code Lyoko."

Jonathan broke into a smile and then remembered how bad his head hurt. "I need pain reliever. Pronto."

Evan jumped up out of the bed and held a finger up, "I'll get it, don't move."

So, he didn't move, but he watched the slight jiggle of Evan's ass in his tight grey briefs as he walked out of the room.

\------

  
It was like that for days. They would just lounge around watching shows or movies, laughing when Jonathan couldn't hold his fork properly. Evan taped it to his cast and almost choked watching him eat. Eventually they gave up on dinner when neither one could stop laughing long enough to finish chewing.

It was a quiet Saturday night when Evan noticed how tense and aggitated Jonathan was becoming. He didn't fully understand why until he reached his hand out to squeeze his shoulder and Jonathan flinched away from him which was very uncharacteristic of him considering he liked to sleep with his limbs laying all over him each night.

Jonathan gave an apologetic grin that faded immediately as he curled up in the corner of the couch and looked away.

"Are you okay?" Evan tried and Jonathan picked at his fingers.

"Yeah."

"No. You're not." Evan pushed. "What's wrong?"

Jonathan sighed and cut his eyes at him. "I haven't had a shower in four days and it's really pissing me off."

"Then go get one. Put those cast covers on. No big deal."

Jonathan shook his head and huffed, "You do realize that both of my hands will be covered and there is no possible way for me to wash myself, right?"

Evan had been avoiding that obvious problem but forced himself to face it. He rubbed his eyes. It was just a shower, it didn't mean anything. He swore to him he'd do whatever he needed to take care of him. His broke hands were Evan's fault and that's what made up his mind.

"Yeah, I realize that now." Evan cleared his throat and stood. "Come on."

He held his hand out and Jonathan stared up at him until he gave in and let Evan pull him up. But Evan didn't let go, instead leading him by his fingers to his master bathroom. Jonathan watched nervously from the doorway while Evan got the shower hot, swallowing thickly when he flicked the water from his hand and started pulling his shirt over his head.

"What exactly are you doing?" Jonathan messed with the zipper on his jacket, curling his toes in his socks when Evan unbuttoned his pants and looked over at him.

"I'm getting in the shower with you. I'll wash you, it's not a problem. I don't want you to be pissed off because you're dirty." Evan sighed. "Seriously, it's just a shower. Get in. You don't even have to put those covers on your hands, just keep your casts out of the water."

Jonathan felt the steam from the shower making his head foggy and sweat form on his neck. "That's not . . . that's really not a good idea."

Evan's pants hit the floor and he stepped out of them, already thumbing at the elasctic of his briefs. Jonathan could feel it pooling fast, that heat in his stomach.

"Why is it not a good idea? Do you want to be clean or not?" Evan wondered as he pulled out two towels and wash cloths.

"Because." Jonathan stalled and he couldn't avoid Evan's eyes when the man stepped closer. "I mean . . . I haven't been able to . . ."

Evan leaned against the sink and sighed. "Jonathan. I get it."

He looked up at the Asian, feeling the heat in his face from embarrassment. "If you do, then you know why I don't want to get in the shower with you."

"Listen, I don't care. I understand how a guy's body works. I have one too you know. I get that you haven't got off in over a week probably. You've been tense and I'll be touching you." Evan grinned when Jonathan groaned and shut his eyes tight dramatically. "It's not gonna freak me out if you get hard in there. It's just a dick, Delirious. As long as it doesn't bite me, I'll be okay."

Jonathan snorted and cracked an eye open, chewing on his lip as he thought. "Okay. But don't say I didn't warn you. I'll try to keep it down."

"Alright, now get in already before the hot water is gone." Evan hurried him, helping him pull his shirt off.

Jonathan watched his friend slip out of his underwear, revealing his perfect ass before he slipped behind the glass. "Come on."

Jonathan stood there for a moment before he shed the rest of his clothes and took a deep breath before he stepped in behind him. The moment his eyes fell on the water running off Evan's skin, he was fighting it back. A furious erection was already fighting for air and Jonathan couldn't even move or it would win.

"Hey."

"What?" He ground out.

"Stop." Evan argued and slipped his soapy hands over Jonathan's shoulders. "Relax. Breathe. It's fine."

Jonathan sighed and turned his back to him so he wouldn't wet his casts and as soon as Evan's hands moved down his back a sound escaped and he bit his lip.

"I am so fucking sorry." He almost cried. "God dammit."

He took a deep breath and let his body relax and he was stiff between his legs in mere seconds, leaning against the shower wall with his hands on the metal bar above him. Evan felt him start to shake the longer he washed his skin. He ran his hands smoothly over his hips and he faltered at the noise Jonathan made when he ran his fingers through his hair.

Evan understood the feeling though. That feeling of being so turned on but not being able to get off. Having to wait. He knew how good it felt to have someone else's slick soapy hands running over you and mixed with all the tension that he had on his shoulders, it was probably killing him to even breathe properly.

He didn't regret his decision to do it when he washed his chest and let his hand slip further down, washing his stomach, slipping down further still until he heard Jonathan take in a quick lung full of hot air. Evan's fingers glided easily around his dick that was hot to the touch. He let his chin settle on the curve of Jonathan's neck and accepted him when he leaned back against him and moved his hips with a small whimper on his lips.

Evan let his other hand slip around to dip between his thighs and massage his balls. He started working his hands in tandem, Jonathan rolling his hips slightly as Evan jacked him smoothly. The soap bubbled up and dripped from his tip and ran down Evan's fingers.

"Fuck." Jonathan moaned breathlessly, gripping the bar above him. He let the sounds spill from lips the closer Evan pushed him. " _Tighter_."

Evan granted him his request and Jonathan groaned deep in his chest, wanting nothing more than to dig his teeth and fingers into Evan's body and scream. That thought alone had him coming in his best friend's hand while his mouth hung open. His head fell back on Evan's shoulder as he pulled in air. It was one of the most satisfying orgasms he'd ever had and he felt the tremble in his knees.

"Fuck, dude. How am I gonna get the shampoo out of my hair? I can't even move right now." Jonathan laughed, winded and he felt the awkward worry leave him when Evan giggled a split second later.

"I got you, man. Stay still." Evan grinned behind his back and unhooked the shower head and rinsed the soap from his hair and body. "Keep your arms up and turn around."

Jonathan moved slowly, laughing when one of his knees buckled. "Jesus."

Evan took his time washing him. He let himself look him over as the water ran down his long figure. There was a bruise just above his hip from where he hit the stairs and Evan felt the guilt roll through him again. But it was quickly replaced with heat when Jonathan sucked a wet lip into his mouth. His eyes were shut, his cock still hard, standing up tall and flushed.

Evan replaced the shower head and reached for the soap again that was meant for himself this time to wash off, but he couldn't get those heavy gasps and short moans out of his head. "Turn around."

"Are we done? Because you might need to help me out of here." Jonathan mused and his breath caught when he felt Evan pressed up against his back. He let a filthy moan escape when he felt those fingers around his still hard dick start working him smoothly all over again.

Evan stroked him hard and quick because he knew the second time was always harder to reach. So he did it how he would've done it himself and it worked perfectly. Jonathan came quickly and Evan heard his own name leave the man's lips in a sweet resigned moan.

Evan clenched his jaw, fighting back his own erection while he felt Jonathan pulsing in his hands again. He was going limp this time and Evan was satisfied knowing that he was well and truly relieved. He let him go and reached for the shower head again, rinsing him off quickly and shutting everything down. He took Jonathan by the arm and made sure his feet were firm on the rug before he let him go and gave him a towel. Evan watched him as he moved in a daze, the subtle muscles in his stomach clenching with each breath he took. He turned his eyes away and ruffled up his hair, distracting himself and trying to make the heat in his gut disappear.

Jonathan pried his eyes open and smiled shyly, "Not gonna lie. That was amazing."

Evan caught himself smiling back as he opened the door, "Do you feel better?"

"Fuck yeah I do." He drawled sleepily and shuffled out of the bathroom, not even bothering to put clothes on before he fell onto the bed. He was asleep in under a minute and Evan was left there staring at a naked man in his bed for the very first time.

There was that heat again and he couldn't stop it this time. He crept back into the bathroom and shut the door with a silent click. He leaned back against the wood and stroked himself embarrassingly fast to orgasm with only one thing on his mind.

_Jonathan._

_\------_

  
"Dude, I want waffles. Right now." Jonathan demanded no more than five seconds after he woke. He didn't give Evan time to think or even brush his teeth before he was throwing random clothes at him, complaining. "Nowwww."

"Okayyyyy. God, you're so needy."

"Yeah, when I'm hungry. So please hurry." Jonathan slid into his clothes with impressive speed and ran a casted hand through his messy hair.

Evan followed him out into the now working elevator with a tired and amused grin stuck on his face. Jonathan power walked to the diner on the corner, sucking down the coffee he ordered, stealing sips of Evan's when it was gone. He was definitely back to normal and Evan was more than happy.

"Yesssss." Jonathan smothered his waffles with syrup and Evan watched it stick to his lips when he shoveled it into his mouth. There was something attractive in the way he licked it away and blinked at him obviously.

Evan leaned his head on his hand and smiled at him. "You're a fucking mess."

Jonathan tried not to smile and failed, setting Evan on fire with a crooked grin that pulled at the dimples in his cheeks. "I know."

\------

  
It was three days later and Evan was starting to think they'd never bring it up again and that it was a one time thing. But he could practically feel the tension rolling off of Jonathan when he walked by him, pulling his clothes off before he crawled into the bed with a heavy aggravated sigh.

Evan fell down beside him soon after locking up the front door and windows and shedding his own clothes. "What's up?"

"Nothing."

"Somethiiiiing." Evan said in a sing-song voice.

Jonathan griped. "I'm tired of these casts on my hands and I'm horny as fuck."

Evan didn't know why his heart started to beat in his face, or why he got so excited, or why he jumped at the opportunity. But he was offering before be could stop himself. "Just ask."

Jonathan lifted his head, a cheeky grin on his face. Evan was glad the shadows fell on him because he was positive he was red. "What? You know I don't care."

Jonathan hummed. "I know. But I think I can last another two days until I get these bastards taken off."

Even watched his breathing even out as he fell asleep. His lengthy half naked body stretched out beside him and all he wanted to do was touch it. He was just a little disappointed that Jonathan didn't accept his offer because it was all he had thought about since it happened. His trembling, his moaning, the sound of him saying his name. Just remembering how firm and hot he was in his hand, the feeling of his ass as he rolled his hips, searching for friction, the way he said 'tighter'. So desperate.

Evan's eyes snapped open when he felt himself drifting off to sleep. He realized he was painfully hard, tenting the sheets on top of him and he looked over to see Jonathan watching him with a hazy half-lidded gaze.

"Will you?" He mumbled pitifully and Evan hadn't even fully nodded his approval before Jonathan was pulling him over until he was laying on top of him. He gasped sharply when their stiff cocks slid snug against one another. Evan reached into his night stand for aid and found the bottle of lube.

He rubbed just enough on himself and let it drip onto Jonathan who was moving his hips impatiently beneath him. "Hurry up!"

Evan tossed the bottle into oblivion and put his weight on him. "Shut up, I'm going."

They didn't speak a word once they started a heavy rhythm. The only sound was their heavy breaths accompanied by the subtle moans they tried to hold back. Evan slid perfectly against his smooth hip, the angle was more than just right. Judging by the way Jonathan was digging his nails into his hips, his angle was just right, too.

"Mm, oh fuck!" Jonathan threw his head back and Evan dropped his head into the crook of his neck, rolling his hips down hard until he was coming along side him. It shook them both and they laid there for a minute just catching their breath until Jonathan made a noise.

"Holy shit, you're heavy." His voice strained and Evan gave a breathy laugh in his ear, feeling him shiver when he rolled off of him. He reached for his shirt on the floor and used it to wipe the mess from both of them before tossing it carelessly to the floor. He fell asleep with a heavy arm resting on his chest. Jonathan's arm.

\------

  
When he woke, prying his sated eyes open to the pale early pre-morning light, they fell on fair warm skin and he suddenly had that urge to touch again. But, he refrained and got out of the bed instead and picked up their dirty clothes and replaced the bottle of lube in his bedside table before he left the room and did some laundry while Jonathan slept in.

Evan fixed himself a cup of coffee and watched the city below as it woke. The sun was about to peek over the horizon and he wondered what it would be like to permanently have someone in his bed like that. Someone like Jonathan who was wild and clingy when he wanted to be. Someone who would literally pull him out of bed by his feet if he was hungry enough. Someone who stole bites of his food when he would turn away and try to play it off before he started laughing like an adorable idiot.

The sun came up and he felt a warmth spread over him along with a presence that crept up from behind, sliding cold fingers across his that were holding his coffee mug. Evan didn't even look back at him, just let him steal his drink and listened to him hum around the hot liquid as it warmed his throat before he handed it back. Evan gripped it again and grinned, "There's more in the kitchen, you know."

Jonathan pressed his lips to Evan's shoulder as more of a friendly nudge than a kiss and said, "I know, but yours is always so much better."

Evan finally turned and he regretted it because he saw the sun in his clear eyes as well as the city. He even saw himself. The world was reflected in them and he couldn't do anything but stare. It was only made worse when Jonathan started to show the beginnings of a smile. A smile so bright and wide and white that Evan was more than tempted to jump head first into it. He felt himself leaning and snapped out of it, playing it off as a tease when he made himself keep moving, leaving Jonathan there confused by the window. But he didn't linger too long and was soon following him into the kitchen.

Evan fixed him a cup of coffee and handed it to him, "Here. Just the way you like it; _mine_."

Jonathan let his fingers brush his again and it left a subtle tingling the way it had been the past few days. He sipped at it and grinned, but Evan noticed that it didn't reach his eyes that time. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

\------

  
Jonathan was bouncing his leg anxiously as they waited for the doctor to come saw his casts off and make sure his right hand had set properly. He was a little disappointed when he told him that it had and he was fine and free to go. He tried to be happy about it which he was because those fuckers had been so itchy and in the way of everything and now they were gone and so was the possibility of Evan touching him ever again. That's what had him walking around with a black cloud over his head as they browsed through a weekend convention.

Evan noticed. He could see it in the way Jonathan wouldn't even get close to him, always keeping a foot between them, making sure their shoulders never brushed. It was making him sick so he forced it one time when the crowd got thick. He slid his hand up his back and let it rest on his shoulder that tensed immediately, but it relaxed the longer Evan kept it there. He felt a little better when Jonathan got distracted by a Mortal Kombat display and wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him over to it to fanboy for a few minutes.

Jonathan knew what Evan was trying to do. He was trying to make it normal between them again even though it was last thing Jonathan wanted. All Jonathan could think about when Evan touched him was his tan naked body laid out on top of him or his hot hands pulling obscene noises from his lungs. It didn't make it any better that Evan decided to wear a tight black shirt and black hat and jeans that made his ass look even more perfect than it already was. It made Jonathan want it all even more and he knew he never should've got in the shower with him that night. He should've just sucked it up and let Evan wash his hair in the sink and be done with it. But he'd given in like he always did when it came to Evan.

He took what contact he could get even though he knew it was going to kill him in the end. He stuck by his warm side for the rest of the evening and followed him and a few other guys to a bar for a beer or two or three. Next thing he knew he was laughing like a maniac at the stories Evan was telling him as they rode home in a cab. He fell against him in the elevator and Evan was having to hold him up and half-carry him down the hall because he couldn't stop giggling. It was making his knees weak.

Evan got him inside where he fell down onto the couch and yanked his jacket off and reached his hand out for him. Evan took it and Jonathan pulled him down onto the cushions and pulled the hat off his head and straddled his waist, grinning wickedly down at him as he slid his hands up his shirt. He bit at his bottom lip when he rolled his hips into his. Evan let his hands grab at his sides and pull him down harder against him. He let out a hot rush of air when Jonathan let a pretty noise echo around them. Evan unbuttoned his pants, helping him get free, wrapping his fingers around his dick and pulling him until Jonathan was bucking in his hips. He leaned down, breathing liquor breath against his lips as he fucked his hand, but they never kissed even though Evan really wanted them to.

Evan was uncomfortably hard in his constricting jeans and the louder Jonathan became the worse it got. Jonathan whined in his ear, "Tighter. Fuck! Harder."

Evan was close just hearing his unrestrained cries being pouring directly into his brain. He couldn't stand it anymore. He turned his head and let his tongue come into contact with Jonathan's neck. When he bit down with his teeth and squeezed him tighter at the same time, Jonathan sucked in a breath, pulsed in his hand hard as he came, and said his name so fucking sweet.

"Evannn . . . fuck!" He gasped as he rocked into his slick hand. "Oh my fucking god . . . shit."

He collapsed on him and Evan thought he was going to stay there and fall asleep but a moment later he moved, still somewhat out of breath as he moved, crawling backwards until he was hovering over Evan's dick that was pressing hard against the fabric of his jeans. Jonathan unbuttoned his pants quickly, unzipping him just as fast and Evan didn't have time to object before his cock was free and being engulfed by Jonathan's scorching mouth.

Evan let his head fall back and moved a hand to settle in Jonathan's unruly hair as he sucked him slow but so smooth and intense. "Holy shit."

He found himself moaning around his hot tongue as he bobbed his head so perfectly. Jonathan clearly didn't have a problem with how hard Evan was pulling at his hair or how bad he was at keeping his hips still. He was getting there and rolling his hips up in time with him. "Jonathan, I'm close. Close, close!"

But the man didn't stop and Evan looked down at him, meeting his lust blown eyes as he swallowed him down even as he called out loudly and came in his mouth. Evan continued to let himself slide between those red lips, so swollen as he drank every drop he had to offer. He watched, mesmerized by the way Jonathan never stopped even when Evan started to flinch with sensitivity. He kept going until Evan felt it roll through him again and he was fucking up into his mouth even harder, coming again in moments, almost crying at how good it felt.

"I can't . . . oh my god!" Evan lost it and pulled him off before Jonathan killed him. "Fuckin' hell, dude."

All Jonathan could do was wipe his lips and fall back onto the cushions with a satisfied hum. He somehow found the strength to move and pulled Evan to his feet. It was his turn to half-carry him around and they were asleep as soon as they hit the bed.

If Evan remembered anything it was that he didn't think he'd ever get enough. He wanted every inch of his body against his again and he woke in the middle of the night to pull Jonathan back against his chest and throw a leg over him. He listened to him give a small sound of contentment and approval, grinning when he snuggled back against him and threaded their fingers together across his stomach before they both fell asleep again.

He liked it this way, but he didn't quite know what to do about it. He knew Jonathan needed to go home and he didn't even know if this was what he wanted. Maybe this was just a way in which he was relieving his stress. Maybe Evan was just relieving stress too. Maybe this didn't mean anything. Maybe they were the kind of friends that could help each other out when they needed it.

Maybe they were simply doing each other a favor.

\------

  
Evan only woke up because he had such a gross taste in his mouth; beer and morning breath. His bed was empty and he wandered into the bathroom to brush his teeth, noticing that the second toothbrush he had grown accustomed to seeing over the past three weeks was gone. He rinsed his mouth and pulled some clothes on before he stepped into the living room to find Jonathan on the phone. Evan guessed that it was his mother again by the look on his face.

"I'm coming home! Stop freaking out! What is wrong with me taking some time away every now and then?! It _literally_ does not concern you at all. I don't live with you and you didn't even have to watch my dog the whole time." Jonathan pulled at his hair. "Mom! Why are you so concerned with who I'm with?! I'm a grown ass man, who can be with whoever the fuck he wants to be with! No! I don't care what your goddamn church group says! I don't live my life based off of what you and all your holy-roller friends think, Mom. Get that through your head and accept the fact that I like women _and_ men. I'll be home soon. Bye."

Jonathan hung up and swallowed visibly when he saw Evan standing there in the hall way with his hands in his pockets. "Good morning."

Jonathan sighed, "Morning. I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Sorry you had to hear any of that." He tried to brush the wrinkles out of his shirt. "My mother is a fucking fly in my ear trying to marry me off and make me have babies. But she has three daughters that are perfectly capable of giving her all of that. She's just against the idea of me liking anything on two legs. I'm not her ideal son I guess. But anyway . . ."

"Don't apologize for that." Evan shook his head. "You do you. Don't worry about her."

Jonathan finally gave him a genuine grin even though it was a little sad still, "Thanks."

They stood there in a comfortable silence before Evan got the hint when he saw Jonathan's luggage sitting my the front door. "So, you want to get breakfast before you leave?"

Jonathan rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, the flight I booked last week was for today. I forgot to tell you and I almost forgot about it myself. I was smart enough to put a reminder on my phone though. I get so carried away with you, I usually forget everything."

Evan blinked, "You do?"

Jonathan nodded, "Yeah, like the time we played for three days straight and I forgot it was my sister's graduation and I almost didn't make it there in time. I forgot to wear a tie."

Evan chuckled, "Oh yeah. That was pretty funny. Or the time you forgot you had food in your oven and I remember hearing you cursing everything within five miles as your smoke alarm went off."

Jonathan giggled but it faded when he looked him up and down. He cleared his throat, "Yeah, dude. Let's get breakfast before I go."

"Alright."

\------

  
So there they sat in the same booth they had claimed in the corner and ate at almost every morning. Or at least every time Jonathan demanded breakfast or Evan would be murdered. Evan grinned to himself and looked up to find Jonathan watching him in the blinding morning light coming through the shades. There was the world again in his eyes as he waited for Evan to say . . . _anything_.

Evan opened his mouth to say something but all that came out was, "What time is your flight?"

He saw the pain flash across Jonathan's face and he blinked slowly before looking down at his unfinished waffles. Evan's eyes were drawn to his lips, the ones that . . .

"So that's it?" Jonathan wondered and Evan saw the tears gathering in his eyes, glistening like oceans. "You're just gonna let me go?"

Evan didn't really know what to say. He didn't know what to do. He hadn't been prepared for any of this. He certainly wasn't prepared for the way his heart ached when the tears finally fell down Jonathan's face. Evan swallowed, "Don't . . ."

"Don't what? Don't cry?!" Jonathan wiped them away and sniffed. "Don't cry because you keep looking at me like you want to keep me and kiss me but you just . . . don't? Has this just been a string of favors or do you really fucking care about me? Did you really want to hold me that close last night or was that just for _my_ sake? Or was that just you doing me another goddamn favor?"

"Jonathan!" Evan sat there as the man stormed out of the diner, turning heads with their outburst. He sat there, heart pounding, anxiety bubbling up in his stomach the longer he sat there, the further away Jonathan got. He took a deep breath and rubbed at his face.

There were questions that only he could answer.

Did he want to keep Jonathan? Did he want to keep that warm ball of energy in his bed? That smile, that smirk, that classic laugh and those fingers that gripped him so tight when he called his name? Did he want to hear him sucking in air beneath him? Did he want to keep acting like he didn't see him stealing a bite of his food? Did he want to make him smile, make him happy, make his head fall back with laughter? Did he want to wake up to those crystal clear eyes every day just to see the entire universe staring back at him?

Even threw money on the table and pulled his hat on backwards and started running down the sidewalk after him because the answer to all his question were all one and and the same.

_Yes._

\------

  
Jonathan couldn't run anymore and he was about to keep walking straight into traffic with his eyes still blurry with tears and end it all when he felt familiar fingers on his arm spinning him on the sidewalk. Evan took his face in his hands and wiped at his tears, looking him in the eyes when he said, " _Stay_. I'll have your dog flown over here and have your number changed so your mom never calls you again and tells you what a fuck-up of a son you are. Because I really care about you and it wasn't just a huge favor and I meant to hold you that close because I literally can't get enough of you and you can drink all of my coffee everyday. I don't fucking care."

Jonathan was slowly grinning the more Evan rambled and he was leaning in the whole time until their lips finally crashed together as the crowd moved around them, paying them no mind as they opened their greedy mouths for each other. It kind of hurt how perfect Jonathan felt against him. It hurt how pretty he was when he cried.

The were smiling when they finally pulled away to breathe. Evan laughed at the look on Jonathan's face when he said, "I'm kind of glad you fell down the stairs."

Evan ran his thumb over Jonathan's lips that were red once more and wet. His eyes matched the dark look in Jonathan's when his tongue flicked out to touch his finger. They shared another needy kiss and took a stranger's advice when they told them to get a room.


	2. Dream Walkers

 

Jonathan used to dream that he could fly. Almost every night that's what he would do. He would fly as far and fast as he could, some nights just floating in the clouds, watching the cities below. It was so peaceful. Once upon a time someone told him that flying in his dreams meant that he was a very happy person or very pleased with certain aspects in his life. Which was true at the time, but slowly his dreams started to fade until his feet were planted on the ground and all he did was stare at the sky and wonder what he did wrong. Why couldn't he fly?

He started to wake with a headache each morning, trying to chase his empty dreams away with a hot cup of strong coffee. It usually worked and he went to work playing games like he did every other day. It made him forget whenever he heard his friends' familiar voices, heard that one person in particular. It made his fingers tingle sometimes.

The dreams changed into something tranquil and even though he couldn't fly, he felt whole and he didn't know why. It was beautiful when he slept and sometimes he didn't want to wake up. He always dreamed he was in a house, the walls the calm pastel color of early morning. The windows were ceiling to floor and his feet were warm as he slowly got out of the soft bed, the sheets felt like silk. The pillow next to his was used, the blankets a mess. He never felt alone as he walked through the house. It was ambient, the aroma was fresh and sweet; a smell he never knew before. There was always a room with double doors that led to a balcony and through those foggy windows he could see a figure on the other side leaning against the rail. He didn't know who it was but he felt so at ease the closer he got. The figure would turn, tall and radiant. They'd place their hand on the window and Jonathan placed his against it. He could feel the warmth closing around him each time he did. The knob on the door would turn, he'd smile, then he'd wake.

For weeks he dreamed of that place, exploring something new each time. The bathroom held two toothbrushes, the closet had two separate sides. Two pairs of converse sat by the front door. It never really occurred to him who the other person might be until he started to feel that familiar tingle each time he walked over to those balcony doors. It was a feeling that began to follow him back to reality, buzzing in his fingers and the back of his mind when he opened his eyes each morning. It buzzed in his toes when he saw pictures of him on Instagram, caught glimpses of him in someone's vlog, heard his voice when he answered his Skype call. It gripped at his heart when he saw how happy he was with everyone else. It made his stomach turn when he saw the person he spent his days with.

He became filled with envy that slowly turned into jealously and he started to push him away. Jonathan found that it was easier not to talk to him or think about him or look at him. So, he stayed in his room most days playing every solo game he could find until the guy started to text him relentlessly always asking him if he was okay or if he wanted to play with him and the others. Jonathan always made an excuse. It got to the point where he just wanted to stay in that perfect dream and never wake up. He even went so far as to take a small sedative to make his dreams last a little bit longer.

Jonathan pulled his sheets up to his face and looked at his phone when it went off. The text read, "I miss you."

He sighed, rolled over, and closed his eyes. When he opened them again he was in the dream, in the house that made him feel like nothing else mattered. He never wanted to leave this place. Jonathan was walking towards the kitchen, running his fingers along the spotless marble counter where a hot mug of coffee was waiting. But just as his hand circled around it he heard his name. A soft echo of a voice he loved.

"Jonathan."

He looked left at the balcony doors where that hand was pressed against the window. The knob turned and he sat the mug on the counter as the door opened. A tall, tan, shirtless figure walked in. His features came into view when the guy shut the door behind him.

"Evan." Jonathan whispered, a smile playing his lips as they stepped towards each other.

Evan touched his fingers to his face and searched his eyes. He sounded a little torn when he said, "I knew it was you in here this whole time. I knew it."

"What do you mean?" Jonathan leaned into his touch, eating up the warmth.

"Every time I go to sleep, I end up on that balcony. I look out at the trees and the mist until I hear someone moving around in here. I feel you get closer, I feel your hand on the other side of that glass. But as soon as I open the door, the house is empty and you're gone." Evan said and ran his thumb across his cheekbone.

Jonathan felt a little bit breathless, but it felt so good. "That's when I wake up. I don't know what's different this time. But I'm sure I'll wake up any second now and feel like killing myself."

"Don't. Please, stay." Evan pleaded softly and pressed their foreheads together. "I said that I missed you."

"I know."

"You didn't answer."

"I'm scared to."

Evan blinked, "You've been avoiding me."

"This is a dream, Evan. You're not supposed to know any of that and I'm not supposed to be thinking about it." Jonathan grinned sadly.

Evan let his hands settle on his waist. "What if we've both been dreaming the same dream? What if we're both asleep, but we're in the same dream together?"

"That would be pretty amazing, but as much as I'd like this to be real I know it's not." Jonathan licked his lips.

"But if this is real, then I finally know what you look like." Evan smirked.

"And what do you think about that?"

"I think you're cute as hell." Evan smiled and leaned in to kiss him but Jonathan moved back.

"That's not a good idea."

Evan moved close again, "Why not? It's just a dream right? I want to. It's something I've always thought about."

"You have a girlfriend."

"I do." Evan whispered. "But I still think about you. We can do whatever we want in here. In here it's just me and you."

Jonathan hesitated when Evan leaned in again but he was right. It was just a dream and he'd be lying if he said he didn't want it too. Even if this dreamy Evan wasn't real. He closed the distance between their lips and it felt more real than reality. He could feel the heat in his face, the slight uncertainty in his fingers as he touched him. But then he felt the fire in his own gut when Evan slipped his hands down his back while his tongue delved deep into his mouth.

Evan pulled back, inhaling a deep breath. "God, this feels so real."

"I know. Come back." Jonathan said in a rush and pulled him back in. Evan's hands went to his ass and he picked him up, setting him on the counter. Jonathan lifted himself and Evan pulled his sweatpants down his legs until they were forgotten on the floor. He crawled on the marble until he was hovering over him, sucking at his skin and laying him down as he let his fingers explore. Jonathan was aching it was so good. He pulled at Evan's hand until he brought it to his lips where he sucked at two of his fingers. He caught his eyes as he wet them and Evan knew what to do when he was done. Jonathan pulled a leg up and Evan gently worked his fingers in as he stroked him with his other hand.

"I've never done this before."

"Neither have I." Jonathan bit at his lip as the pressure increased with each stroke of Evan's hands. "That feels so fucking good. I think I'm ready."

"Sure?"

"No, but I want you." Jonathan almost whined. "So fucking bad. I think about you all fucking day. I hate it. Now I'm dreaming about you fucking me."

Evan kissed at his leg as he lifted it above his shoulder. He lined himself up, "Well, I'm sleeping next to my girlfriend right now and I'm dreaming about fucking you. On a goddamn counter top. It's the hottest thing I've ever seen."

He slid into him slowly, watching the look on Jonathan's face. He had gripped the sides of the marble and his mouth was wide open, head thrown back. "God, Evan!"

"Bad?"

"No! Good, really good." He sucked in a breath and reached for him. Evan leaned down and kissed him hard before he started to move.

The house was full of heavy breaths and cries and Jonathan had never had such a vivid dream because he remembered every hot second of it when he woke up. It was like he hadn't slept at all. He even felt a little awkward when he text Evan back finally. "I miss you, too. I'm sorry, let's play."

So they played and Evan kept clearing his throat as they talked. It was odd. Jonathan wet his lips and asked, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine." Evan reassured him but then he added, "I had a weird dream."

Jonathan's heart shot up to his throat. "Oh... do you wanna talk about it?"

Evan sighed, "No, it's fine. Really. I'm fine."

"Alright, if you say so." Jonathan tried to forget about it but he dreamed about it as usual. Evan was there again, sitting on the couch in that tranquil house waiting for him.

Jonathan walked over to him and sat in his lap. "You told me you had a weird dream."

"I did." Evan nodded. "I've never had a gay dream before. But you were so good yesterday. I thought about you all day today. I couldn't hardly look at my own girlfriend. I remember it all in crystal clear detail. I could still feel your lips on mine. I could hear you moaning. It just echoed in my head all day and I didn't even want her to touch me. I'm sleeping on the couch right now, told her I had a headache and I couldn't go to sleep, so I left her in the bed."

Jonathan exhaled, took his face in his hands and kissed him softly. "This isn't real, this is not real. You're not real and I don't know why my head is making it seem like you are, like you're dreaming the same dream as me. Like we are real in here and we could be together. It's fucking torture. I kind of hate myself for it."

Evan nudged his cheek with his nose. "I feel the exact same way. I know it's _you_ that's not real, but my head is making you out to be like you're the one who's dreaming and I'm in it. But I'm the real one here. You're just part of my imagination. You probably don't even really have a tongue ring do you?"

Jonathan smirked, "I do actually. This is me I swear. But it's you that's not real."

"I guess we'll never know who's dreaming and who isn't." Evan ran his hands up his body. "All I know is that I couldn't wait to go to sleep."

Jonathan smiled and bit at his lip, "Yeah, I couldn't wait either."

Jonathan couldn't find the will to leave his bedroom after that. He woke from the dream with ruined briefs. Again. Evan had fucked him right then and there on that couch while he bit at his collar bones. Jonathan rubbed his eyes and found himself smiling about it as he showered it off. But then again it was kind of fucked up that his mind had made that entire house that he'd rather live in than stay in the real world. He'd rather be with Evan because in the real world, Evan was with someone else. Evan didn't want him in reality so he was going to take what he could get.

It was that way for weeks. He'd fall asleep and fall into Evan's arms and they'd spend hours just being with each other, kissing, loving, having sex on every surface they could find. It was heaven until Jonathan feel asleep one night and woke up in the silk sheets like he always did, but for the first time Evan was lying in the bed next to him with a pretty smile as he ran his fingers over him.

"There you are." Evan whispered.

"Hey." Jonathan sat up and looked around. Something felt different, but not in a bad way.

"I was thinking."

"About what?" Jonathan moved closer to feel his heat.

"You." Evan kissed his shoulder. "I was thinking about how this dream never repeats, we always remember what we did the day before. Do you think we're one of those people that have learned how to control their dreams? Like this house always looks the same. What if we could change it? What if we could go anywhere we wanted to?"

Jonathan sat there in thought for a moment before he shrugged. "We can try. It's just a dream anyway."

"Yeah." Evan nodded. "But how do we change it? Use the force?"

Jonathan laughed and shook his head. "I don't know. How about we both close our eyes and think about where we want to be."

"Okay." Evan closed his eyes and took Jonathan's hands in his as they sat on the bed. "You go first. Where do you want to be?"

Jonathan relaxed and imagined a salty breeze. "I want to be on the Carolina shore by the beach just as the sun is setting."

He heard the waves crashing all of a sudden and when he opened his eyes he felt the warm breeze whipping their hair around. He could taste the ocean on his tongue and Evan was taken aback for a moment. "This is amazing."

Jonathan broke into a smile and pulled him to his feet. "Come on. I bet we can breathe underwater!"

They could.

It was almost better than flying as they swam further out into the ocean without losing their energy or their breath. The sun was making the water ripple with light as they sank beneath the surface without the urge to breath. They were weightless and free and Jonathan felt Evan pulling him into a kiss as the light cast odd waves of color across his face. It was kind of disastrous with the way he made him feel. It was kind of sad how hard he fell in love with him more and more each night he fell asleep. He never wanted it to end but it was ripping him apart a grain of sand at a time. Eventually it was going to kill him, but Jonathan couldn't let go. Even though none of it was real.

The next night, Evan took them to a forest in the middle of Canada where there were tree houses linked together in the treetops for miles. The next time, Jonathan took them to the top of a skyscraper in the middle of a city where they walked off the edge and fell into flight right before they hit the pavement. They soared and Jonathan had finally found his ability to fly in his dreams again. It meant he was happy. With Evan's hand in his, how could be not be?

But when he woke, he began to cry. The ache in his chest became so heavy that he almost couldn't move. He tried to stay awake that night and at four in the morning his phone went off. His heart clenched when he saw that it was Evan. He ignored it, because he couldn't stand to hear him anymore. Jonathan wanted to disappear.

Jonathan hadn't slept in three days and it was showing. Luke had come over and made him a drink to calm down his nerves that seemed to be extra worked up. He didn't tell him that he had slipped a sleeping pill in there but it didn't matter because he was already passed out. Luke carried him to bed and shut his door before he went and sat on the couch, watching tv while he rested. He was tired of getting worried phone calls from Evan saying to go check on Delirious. Evan never told him why, just told him to do it. Begged him to do it. So he did.

"I called you, Jonathan." Evan said in the darkened house. The one that was usually so tranquil and comforting. But it was darker that normal, like their sun was fading. "Where have you been?"

Jonathan looked up at his figure by the tall windows, the trees were blowing around furiously outside, the wind was howling. "I didn't want to fall asleep."

"Why not? I thought you liked being here with me." Evan sat on the edge of the bed.

"I do and that's why I'm trying to stop." Jonathan knew what was coming, he could feel the lump rising in his throat.

"I made Luke check on you, I'm assuming that's why you're asleep now."

Jonathan sat up in the silk sheets that Evan had laid him down in one day and made the sweetest love to him. "NO! Stop talking to me like you're actually Evan! Stop talking to me like you know what's going on my life because you don't! You're not real!"

He got out of the bed and he felt so fucking heavy as he made his way through the house, pulling everything off the walls and throwing it as hard as he could. They never touched ground, they simply floated in space. Evan was right behind him. "Jonathan listen to me. This is real, you have to believe me. I don't know how to make you understand but I've been doing research and it's believed that two people can share the same dream world, the same consciousness. I've never had dreams so real before I found myself in yours. You've been acting so weird in the real world and so have I and now I know why. It's because this is real."

Jonathan pushed him away and then there was lighting flashing in the window, illuminating everything around them as it drifted where Jonathan had thrown it all. "Evan, please! I can't do this anymore. I love every minute I spend with you here but it's so fucking good that I don't want to wake up. Ever. I'm so fucking in love with you here that I can't stand to look at you in real life, or think about you, or play with you. I can't fucking stand to hear you because all I can feel is your hands in my hair or your lips on mine... God, I fucking feel you breathing down my neck. I can hardly function, do you understand?!"

Evan reached for him and Jonathan couldn't get away. He nearly melted against him when he pulled him into his arms. The storm raged outside their world they'd created, or better yet the world Jonathan had created. It was kind of peaceful but everything here always was.

"Jonathan, I love you. I've never hurt like this in my entire life. I don't even want to get out of bed."

"You're not real."

"But my bed is so cold." Evan whispered.

"You have a girlfriend."

"I left her."

"No. This isn't real." Jonathan repeated.

"I love you." Evan shook him. "Listen to me."

Jonathan shook his head and felt their world crumbling as he cried. "No!"

"I love you!"

"WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!" He screamed at himself until his eyes flew open and Luke was standing over him shaking him awake. "Wake up, man. It's okay, it was just a dream."

Jonathan felt like he was dying. He was hurting so bad on the inside he wouldn't mind if his soul left his body that very second. "Yeah." He wiped at his eyes. "It was just a fucking dream."

A few days passed and Jonathan stopped dreaming. They were blank and he felt like he wasn't even sleeping through the night. It was like he'd lay down and blink and it was morning. There was nothing and he was somewhat grateful, but a part of him missed it. He missed Evan who had disappeared both in his dreams and in reality. He hadn't been online in days. It was wishful thinking, Jonathan silently hoping that Evan had really been there in his dreams. But that was stuff of fantasies and sci-fi television. So he tried to move on, but he couldn't hardly move. Those dreams had sucked the life out of him and he couldn't hardly find the will to join the guys' game, but he did.

"Hey, Delirious. Long time no see." Tyler commented.

"Yeah." Was all he said. He couldn't muster up anything more.

"You guys hear about Evan?" Marcel spoke up.

"No, what?"

"He and his girl split." Marcel stated and Jonathan felt wide awake all of a sudden. "Like a week ago. He wouldn't tell me why he broke up with her."

Then he felt sick. "I gotta go guys."

He left the party leaving everyone even more confused but he didn't care. He just didn't think he could hurt anymore than he already was.

Luke came over a few days later and saw the exhaustion on his face. "Jonathan. You just need to get out of this house, take a vacation. Take your mind off of everything. Okay?"

"I don't know. I just, I can't explain any of it to you. It's ridiculous. It sounds so stupid." Jonathan wrapped his arms around himself and tried to will the cold away.

"My parents just got his fucking amazing house up in the mountains, like killer view. Why don't you go up there and chill out, take in the scenery, relax for a week or two? Come on, I'll help you pack. I won't take no for an answer." Luke brushed past him and found his luggage bags and started to toss random sets of clothes in them. He threw him in his car and set the address on his GPS. "Go."

Jonathan sat there for a few minutes as he stared out at the road, eventually giving up and putting the car in drive following the directions of the annoying voice on the device. He drove for hours, the farther he went the closer the mountains became and a few hours later he found himself sitting outside of a beautiful cabin in the woods. The key was in his pocket and he let himself inside finding it a heartbreaking shade of pastel morning light. The bedroom was waiting, silken sheets laid out on the bed. The windows were floor to ceiling and he felt a familiar presence as he looked back down the hall.

He crept through the quiet house, past the open kitchen that opened into the living room that led straight to a balcony closed off by a set of double glass doors. The lump settled in his throat as he walked closer. He felt tears as he saw a hazy figure just on the other side and he felt his knees go weak when that figure turned and pressed their hand against the glass.

Jonathan's fingers were trembling but he pressed them against the glass anyway. The doorknob turned and he sobbed. "Evan?"

The Asian stepped into view, visibly nervous but smiling as he shut the door behind him. He didn't speak, just pulled Jonathan into his arms and breathed him in. Jonathan's fingers were digging into him as he cried and when he pulled away to wipe at his eyes Evan finally spoke. "I told you it was real."

"How?"

"I don't know." Evan shook his head. "And I don't care. I really left her, I was really there with you every night in that dream. I walked on the beach with you, swam with you, kissed you beneath the water, ran through those trees, walked off that building and flew with you. That was me, Jonathan. I was really there, I swear to you. I love you and that's real. We are real."

Evan grabbed his face and kissed him hard pulling back only to smile and say, "You really do have a tongue ring. That's so fucking hot."

They kissed on every surface of the cabin, scared the birds off with their screams, and fell in love all over again. Jonathan still didn't understand how they could have been in the same dream but he wouldn't take any of it back and he'd never question it. He'd never get over seeing Evan's face when he woke up in reality and when he woke up in their dream.

They called themselves dream walkers who kept their feet on the ground by day and went on adventures across the world and through the universe at night.

Always together, never apart.


	3. Here

"Delirous, please?" Evan begged shamelessly. "It'll just be me and you, I promise. Come on, it's for my birthday."

Jonathan sighed and glanced over the teddy bear propped up against his pillows. It was his gift from Evan along with a box full of Reese's and Kit Kats and a Buzz Lightyear figurine. He also received a corny birthday card with dicks drawn all over it with a small 'With love, Evan' written in the midst. It was perfect and he agreed that it would be nice to return the favor in person this time. He then looked over at the wrapped up gift that he was going to get a label for today from the post office to send to him in L.A. but now it wasn't necessary.

"Alright, I'll come."

"Hang on." Evan said. "Okay, say it again. I got to record this as proof that you said you were coming. Because if you back out, I'm kicking your ass."

Jonathan laughed. "You're a dick."

"Say it again."

"You're a dick."

" _Delirious_." Evan groaned.

" _Okay_. I, Jonathan a.k.a. H2O Delirious told Vanoss that I was coming to his apartment in Los Angeles, California to Netflix and chill." He ended with a laugh and Evan couldn't be mad at him.

"Close enough."

It was the end to a perfect day for Evan. First he'd reached fourteen million subscribers, landed a sponsor with LootCrate, and now he had convinced Delirious to come see him for the first time since they'd known each other. He could've made it easier and just said, "Hey it's my birthday coming up can you maybe turn your camera on and show me your face?" But he didn't want it to happen that way. He wanted to see his face while he was walking towards him. He wanted to see him face to face and feel the satisfaction of finally knowing first hand. Evan wanted to see him two feet from him, not two thousand miles.

**\------**

  
Jonathan still had two weeks before he left for California. He still had two weeks to back out but he knew he wouldn't. He couldn't do that to Evan, the guy he was pretty much in love with. He paced his house for days like a nervous wreck, trying not to pull his hair out and worry holes in the sleeves of his favorite jacket. The more he worried the faster the days went by and before he could prepare himself he was waving goodbye to Luke before he turned and boarded his flight.

Now, Jonathan wasn't normally a nervous person. He was very easy-going, enthusiastic, and cheerful about almost everything. Everything but Evan or the idea of meeting him and being in unfamiliar territory with the possibility of someone finding him out and exposing him. Publicity was also something that made him itch. The thought of cameras, crowds, and people prying into his life made him sick with worry. He took a deep breath when he boarded his connecting flight in Texas and watched the ground drop beneath him for the second time that day. Was he really ready for this and the risks that it included? He would never be ready, but if he didn't do this now he didn't know if he ever would.

As he stepped off the plane and into LAX, he text Evan that he was in L.A. and headed to check into his hotel.

_"Awesome, I'll see you in a little while. (:"_

A little while. A few hours. He wished he had more than just a little while to fucking mentally prepare himself for what was about to happen. He was about to show Evan, goddamn _VanossGaming_ his actual face. He'd no longer be a mystery to him, no longer interesting and worth keeping around. But this was something that he always wanted; to meet his schoolboy crush and feel his skin on his as they shook hands. He dreamed about this, so he swallowed his obnoxious worries and got a cab to his hotel where he checked himself in the mirror for imperfections, fixed his hair that Luke said made him look like Justin Bieber in the 'What Do You Mean?' video. He slapped him for giving him such an insult even though his hair did look just like his, only darker. He smoothed his black v-neck, which felt too tight all of a sudden and slipped his jacket on over it, pulling the hood up and heading back down to the lobby.

His nerves tried to get the best of him as he walked a few blocks over down the busy L.A. streets to the massive apartment complex in which Evan resided. It was nice and looked very expensive and that made Jonathan even more nervous. He felt out of place as he walked inside the lavish lobby with finely dressed couples going to and fro, on pricey dates no doubt. The women toying mindlessly with the jewelry around their necks, the men with their noses in the air. But as he stepped into the elevator, he discovered something odd. A group of younger people, his age and below, ran in behind him crowding his space with noise and laughter and he felt the anxiety pushing down on his shoulders but he held it together. He grew even more uneasy when they all got out on the same floor he was and he watched them run off down the hall in beat up sneaks and jackets around their waists. Music slowly reached his ears and a familiar face caught his eye; Marcel. The dark-skinned goofball was leaned against the wall in the hall talking to some guys who had drinks in their hands. Jonathan's heart sank when he realized they were standing just outside of Evan's apartment.

Evan didn't say he was having a party. In fact Evan said there wasn't going to be anyone. No one but himself and as he ducked his head and hid from Marcel, he walked through the door, weaving past the tight crowd within. The music wasn't loud, but all of the people were. The laughter and voices, the chatter, it numbed his head and he was never one for parties and commotion and places where he couldn't have his space. His idea of a party was his small group of friends gathered on a sofa, listening to good chill music, maybe smoking a little hookah, relaxing, talking about the world. Not this. Not a place packed with people he didn't know, never would know or even get to hear their names over the noise.

Guys whizzed by on their fucking Back to The Future looking hover boards, nearly knocking him over and he felt hands on him that he immediately spun and shook off. Girls grinned at him and he held his hand up in their faces, cutting them off short and sweet as he continued to move through the bodies that were slowly making him claustrophobic and aggravated. He didn't like to be touched and bumped into repeatedly. He took a deep breath, trying to soothe his nerves as he finally found a space in the corner of the living room that wasn't occupied and he backed himself into the darkness as a fog of smoke clouded over him.

Were these people seriously getting high in Evan's apartment?

"Hey!" He yelled over the music, getting the guys' attention. "Don't smoke that shit in here."

The blonde headed one scoffed and rolled his eyes at him, "And you are?"

Jonathan clenched his jaw and stood up to his full height which had him towering over the boy, "I'm someone that knows Evan a hell of a lot better than any of you and if he finds his curtains smelling like fucking skunk weed, he's not gonna be happy and neither am I. So take that shit outside."

"Alright, dude. Chill." The guy held up his hands and moved away toward the exit with his small posse behind him. Jonathan shook his head, growing more irritated by the second as he fell back into his dark corner where he searched the crowd for that familiar face, the one he was supposed to be alone with tonight, but was far from it.

What the hell was he even doing here? He thought he ought to just leave and let Evan wonder where he was but then he caught sight of a white shirt, black jeans, black hat and a terribly attractive face attached to all of it pushing through the crowd. Jonathan made his feet move.

**\------**

  
There were too many people, Evan almost couldn't breathe. His kitchen counters were completely covered in glass bottles, at least a thousand dollars worth of alcohol just sitting around. This wasn't what he had wanted. A small get together with some people for just a little while, but it turned into this and now he was stuck in his own apartment with people he didn't even recognize. They raised their glasses at him, told him happy birthday, then proceeded to party like it was New Year's.

He backed himself into his hallway until his back was against his bedroom door and his phone was in his hand. Delirious hadn't text him back yet and that was almost two hours ago. He prayed he hadn't gotten lost on the way even though he had said he was staying within walking distance. A dark figure in front of him got his attention and he looked up at the hooded figure standing about ten feet away. His face was in shadows.

"Do I know you?" Evan asked, far from amused and ready to tell the guy to leave.

"Yes." The guy said and his voice was smooth like silver. "You know me very well. It doesn't look like you're very good at keeping promises."

"What are you talking abou -"

"It was supposed to be just me and you, Evan." Delirious let his voice grow a bit higher with the distress he was feeling and he saw it the moment Evan realized who he was. Evan's eyes widened and his mouth hung open as he searched for something to say. An excuse maybe, but Jonathan wasn't backing down from this.

"Jonathan . . . listen, I -"

"No. I came here to meet _you_. Not every fucking person in L.A." Delirious fumed, trying to keep his cool. "You promised me and I don't care if it's your birthday. I only wanted _you_ to see me, not your entire social circle. You told me you didn't even like parties, Evan. So what _the fuck_ is all this? Or is this you feeling obligated to be a 'cool guy' just like the time you showed your face when you didn't even want to? This isn't like you. And I thought that you would at least respect the fact that you convinced me to come all the way here on the terms that it would just be us." Jonathan looked around in mock surprise, "But would you look at that. It's _not_ just us. So, I guess while I'm here I'll join the party and go get high in the corner with the cool kids. I heard that Vanoss guy is super chill."

He turned and began squeezing his way through the crowd, hearing Evan calling his name but he never turned back. He felt sick as he pushed his way back to the corner where he pulled up a chair and sat for what felt like hours. The music thrummed in his chest, beer and liquor wafting past his nose every few seconds. His hands were sweaty.

"You look like you're having a lot of fun." Someone said sarcastically and he looked to find a green eyed guy sitting beside him, grinning.

He huffed and messed with the bracelets around his wrist, "Dude, I don't even want to talk to anybody right now to be honest."

"No, no I get it." The guy smiled. "You don't like the atmosphere but you're here for your friend, right?"

"Yeah, something like that." He pushed his hoodie back and ran a hand through his hair.

"You wanna go out on the balcony? It's a lot quieter."

Jonathan felt himself nodding and moving towards the sliding doors with this stranger who he didn't trust. But if it meant he could get away from the noise for a moment, he didn't care. He pulled his hood back up and weaved through the warm bodies that felt like they were suffocating him in the dim light that made his eyes hurt.

**\------**

  
It took Evan an insane amount of time to catch sight of Delirious after he had disappeared into the crowd. An hour to be exact. He was good at hiding and Evan didn't blame him and he was ready to rip his own hair out when someone broke another bottle on his hardwood floor.

"Out! Everybody!" He said loudly but no one was even listening. "Damn it."

That's when he saw a blue jacket in the dim light across the room following someone else, a tall and attractive someone else out onto his balcony where he watched them lean against the rail and relax. They talked forever and he knew that he looked stupid sitting on top of his bar staring out at them, but he couldn't really bring himself to go interrupt. He didn't blame Jonathan for doing what he did or for being upset with him. Because he had broke his promise. He didn't mean to, but it had happened and he couldn't fix it before he got here. There were just too many people and he had no control.

He rubbed his eyes and felt a hand on his leg. Marcel met his eyes with a worried look. "You alright?"

Evan shook his head and glanced back up, feeling the jealousy sting when he saw the two men getting closer to each other outside. "No."

Marcel raised his brows, "Spill."

He put down his drink and took a breath, "I told Delirious to come and he did, but I told him it was just going to be me and him. I only wanted a few people to come over here earlier and they were supposed to leave before he got here but it turned into this and now he's mad at me and I don't know how to fix it."

Marcel smiled, "Don't worry. I got this."

Evan watched him walk over to the breaker box and turn all the switches off, but he turned the lights back on. The music came to an abrupt halt and Evan watched his friend stand up on a chair and cup his hands around his mouth, "Can I have your attention please! This party is officially over! Now, please exit through the front door! Quick, fast, and in a hurry! Let's go!"

Marcel looked down and winked at Evan as people filtered out of the apartment, disappointed and drunk. Evan didn't fucking care. He just wanted them gone so he could fix the most important thing to him; his friendship with Delirious. He watched and waited as a guy came in from the balcony alone and left after giving him a polite nod. Evan gave him a fake smile that dropped as soon as he was gone. Marcel left with the crowd saying that he didn't want to see Delirious because he respected that he was here for Evan and no one else.

Evan slid off the counter when the balcony door swung open again, this time a tall man in blue appearing. His hood hung low on his face and he stopped where he stood in the living room with his hands shoved in his pockets.

Evan cracked his fingers and looked at him sideways, "Will you let me explain?"

Jonathan waited and Evan took that as a yes. "Okay, so I invited a few people over earlier today and I told them they needed to leave by six. But, someone had the nerve to invite more people over and then those said people invited even more people over and it got out of hand and I couldn't get anyone to leave. Most of them didn't even know this was my apartment so they just looked at me like I was stupid when I told them to go. They broke three bottles of liquor on my floor, someone ripped my shower curtain, and there's soap on the floor in the hallway. Fucking garbage everywhere." Evan gestured around them and Delirious looked at the trash scattered all over the nice apartment. "Delirious, I swear to you I didn't plan this. I wanted this to be perfect. I wanted it to just be me and you and I'm sorry. And you're right, this isn't me. I'm not a party kind of guy and I'll admit that I've been going to some even though I don't like it. I just feel like I should be going because of who I am."

Jonathan shook his head, his lips the only thing visible. They pulled back into a sarcastic grin and Evan didn't like it. "Sounds to me like you need to get your priorities straight. You're always telling me how much you hate the publicity but yet you throw yourself out there, because you feel like you should? That's bullshit, Evan. If you don't like it, don't fucking do it. You don't see me putting myself out there because I don't fucking care what everyone else wants. It's my life and I'll live it how I want to. The only reason I came here is because I wanted to, not because I felt obligated to. I came here to be with you and get to know you even better than I already do. But here you are and you're not what I thought you'd be."

Evan pulled his hat off and ran his hands through his hair, "I know. I'm fucking . . . lost right now. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. I have anxiety about everything. I get nervous about going to the post office for fuck's sake. I can't believe I even talked myself into moving down here, to be honest."

"Then what are you doing here?" Jonathan held his long hands up and they caught Evan's eye.

He shrugged, "I don't know. I feel like an idiot. I'm here now, where I always thought I wanted to be and I'm not happy with the way anything is."

"I don't get you." Delirious said and pulled his hood back and if Evan had been holding anything he would've dropped it. Broke it. Just like his heart did when his eyes fell on his face. His eyes, literal gems sitting in his sockets, like diamonds and it floored him. Jonathan was taller than he was, just by an inch or so, but he could feel him looking down on him. His jaw was strong and eyebrows sharp and angled. Inquisitive, intelligent. His stare was . . . intimidating and his hair atop his head fell into his eyes, but it was shorter on the sides. It was dark, almost as dark as the studs in his ears. Evan tried to speak but nothing came out of his open mouth.

"I don't get you." Jonathan looked around again, "You're so unhappy but you literally have everything."

"And you don't?" Evan said, feeling the heat rising between them. Arguing was the last thing he wanted to do with him.

"What do I have, Evan?" Delirious' voice was rising.

"Friends, your identity! A home you're actually comfortable in! An amazing channel and your fucking laugh!" Evan broke and he didn't know that he had envied him so much as he did in that moment.

Delirious huffed, "Evan, you have all of that! You live in this fine ass apartment in California and you're always around people, your friends! You have millions of subscribers, a goddess of a girlfriend, and you think that I'm the one that has everything?!"

"Yes!"

"Why do you think that?!"

"Because you're happy!" Evan yelled and it echoed around the room. He sucked in a ragged breath, "That is something I haven't felt in a really long time."

Evan let his eyes fall to the floor as all of his insecurities surfaced along with emotions he hadn't let out in months. He paced and Jonathan was silent for along time until he walked over to the sofa and sat down, running a hand through his hair. "I don't know what gave you the impression that I'm happy, because I would need more than two hands to count the years that it's been since the last time I was."

Evan felt even worse hearing those words. Now he felt like he had thrown his problems on Jonathan and he didn't even stop to think about the possibility of the guy having his own. "I'm . . . sorry. I didn't know."

Jonathan gave a small shake of his head and shrugged. Evan stepped toward him, "Do you want to talk about it?"

Delirious sighed and smiled slightly, but it felt sad. "You know what's funny? I was going to just show up here one day and surprise you. I thought about how you would react and what the look on your face would be or how you would hug me. And I thought that moment would be the happiest one of my life. But then I thought about how I would probably interrupt you in the middle of something or you'd be on a date with her and it'd be really awkward. So I just . . . stayed home instead and I've just been playing over scenarios in my head for months. Imagining. I thought this was going to be amazing . . . Evan, and I'm sorry you're not happy, but neither am I."

Evan sighed, "Delirious. Just you being here, no matter what the circumstances, has made me happier than I've been in a long time. And that goddess of a girlfriend you mentioned left me weeks ago because I ' _didn't act as happy around her like I did when I gamed with my friends_ '. She basically said I liked playing with you more than I liked being with her and when she said that I couldn't deny it, because I would rather hole up in my room and be a loner with a controller in my hands than be with her and go on dates and socialize. She wasn't what I wanted, so I let her get mad. I let her go."

Jonathan's leg bounced nervously, "Oh. I'm -"

"Don't be sorry, because I'm not. She wasn't everything she always seemed to be. I thought she was perfect and she kind of was, but I didn't feel what I needed to when I was with her, you know?" Evan shrugged.

"I know."

Evan sat down beside him and rubbed at his face. "I'm sorry that this happened the way it did. Can we just . . . start over?"

Jonathan licked his lips and thought for a moment before he got up and walked out the front door, shutting it behind him, leaving Evan sitting there confused until he knocked. Evan broke into a smile and sprinted for the door, swinging it open and feeling the butterflies in his stomach at the sight of Delirious standing there grinning at him.

"Hi." Was all he said and this was what Evan had wanted. This was how we wanted it to go the first time and he yanked him into their first hug and he laughed, feeling the tears collecting at the corner of his eyes. Jonathan held him tight in the circle of his long arms and Evan had never felt so small. Delirious was only a speck taller but he was long and lean and he completely swallowed him whole and it felt amazing. It felt like it should. It was a feeling he'd always wanted and it scared him when he realized what that meant. He pulled away and noticed the way Jonathan let his hands slide down his sides before he let go. His touch was gentle and there was passion in his eyes when he smiled fully, showing his teeth.

His full lips pulled back and Evan was stuck staring. "Hey."

"Nice to meet you, bitch."

Evan laughed and pulled him in, shutting the door behind them. "You too, asshole. Sorry the place is a mess. I think a raccoon got in here and had a fucking party or something."

Jonathan shrugged out of his jacket and hung it up on the back of a chair, looking back at him with a smirk. "I'll help you clean it up, but as long as I'm here we have to listen to my music."

Evan nodded, "Deal."

**(Listen to: Cherub - Doses and Mimosas)**

**\------**

  
So there they were, two long-distance best friends picking up empty cups and wiping up spilled liquor and pizza crust off the expensive floor while music flowed around them. They ended up dancing and singing at the tops of their lungs, falling into step with each other like they always did even when they were thousands of miles apart. Evan stood on his sofa that was a mile long and he shook his hips, pointing at Jonathan who was holding up the remote to his lips as he sang along to the addicting words, moving his body with the ridiculous beat.

In that moment they were both happy.

Jonathan knew he'd always feel that way with him, but this was new for Evan. Evan hadn't felt this way since he got home from PAX East and played for two days straight with Delirious until they couldn't keep their eyes open. He'd brushed the feeling aside at the time, thinking he had just really missed playing with the guy because it had been a while. But he always knew how to cheer himself up, which was to text Delirious a funny picture and wait on him to laugh at it while they played a game. Or simply call him up and talk for a while about nothing in particular, share some new music, laugh at themselves.

Evan never wanted to admit that he had a little extra feelings for him, because that was new and different. That was something he was scared to explore because it involved ridicule and the risk of someone finding out. It was something that made him wish he had hidden his identity as diligently as Jonathan had, then he could do whatever he wanted to and not have to worry.

**\------**

  
His apartment was pretty much spotless and Jonathan was organizing all the liquor, throwing out what wasn't good, taking shots of things he'd never tried before, giggling the drunker he got. Evan watched him unwind, watching him move, becoming loose and pliant as he danced and bobbed his head.

 _To all the bitchass hoes,_  
_That hate me the most_

_Oh yea I hate you too_

_To all the punkass fucks,_  
_That just wanna talk shit_

_I hate you too_

_To all the high class ass,_  
_That's too hard to pass_

_Oh yea I hate you too_

Evan sipped and he laughed as the man shook his smooth hips in his kitchen, feeling the warmth seeping in the longer he stared and appreciated his long body and the way it burned itself into his brain. Jonathan ran a hand up his own shirt, shedding light on the stomach of his skin and Evan felt it pooling. The warmth was now heat and it gathered the more Jonathan leaned over the counter, smiling at him. Until it fell from his face and he realized what he was doing.

"Sorry." He mumbled and ran a hand through his messy hair. "I didn't mean to come here and get drunk and act like an idiot. But I'd be a nervous, clumsy, shaking mess otherwise."

"Why?" Evan pressed.

"Because I like you." Delirious said and rubbed furiously at his face, groaning. "And I definitely didn't plan on telling you that. I just wanted to see you and be with you for a little while and then leave and go home and cry a lot because I'll never be happy."

Evan's heart was gone, it fucking took off fast with Jonathan's confession. "Why aren't you happy?"

"Because I can't be with you. I've always been jealous of her and anyone else you've been with and it's so childish of me, but the only time I feel happy is when I figure out you're single again. Each time you go through a break-up you always come back to me and we play for days on end and you just lean on me, like I'm your rebound and I fucking cling to that like it's my lifeline." Jonathan took a breath, looking like he was going to be sick for saying everything that had been on his mind. He furrowed his brows. "And to have to hold all that in everyday is torture, but I couldn't tell you because it would ruin what we had. You'd never want to talk to me again because you'd know that I pretty much fucking dreamed about you every night. It'd freak you out and now I'm ready to jump off your balcony because I've told you and you're gonna push me away. That's why I can't be happy."

"No." Evan said and shook his head, things moving slower than they really were from the alcohol. "I'm not gonna do any of that. You're still my friend, no matter what you feel for me. You always will be, do you hear me?"

The music changed into something deep, dark, and familiar and Evan liked it. It always put him in a certain mood and he sat up straighter as he eyed his friend.

**(Listen to: Deftones - Change or Korn - Twisted Transistor)**

Jonathan nodded pitifully, at war with himself in his head and he moved around the bar cautiously to stand beside him. He cleared his throat, suddenly feeling very sober when Evan spun in his seat to face him. "Can I just ask one thing of you? You don't have to say yes and I'll leave if you want me to."

Evan cocked his head and looked up at him, "What is it?"

Jonathan looked at his feet and slowly let his eyes travel up until they locked onto his brown eyes. "Can I kiss you? Just once. I need to know and then maybe I can get over -"

"Yes." Evan said and gulped down the rest of his drink before the glass clinked on the counter. Jonathan looked down at him, scared and more than a little unsure until Evan grabbed his waist and pulled him closer, fitting him between his legs looking up at him. "Lay it on me, dude."

Jonathan took a breath and waited until his fingers stopped trembling before he brought them up and placed them on either side of Evan's face, tilting it up and dragging a thumb over his lips. He could feel heat coming off of his face and the beating of his heart. He met his eyes and he knew he would never get over this nor would he get to do it again. So he leaned in and closed his eyes as Evan did, pressing their liquor-wet lips together. Jonathan sighed, finally feeling what he always wanted to; pure bliss with Evan's soft lips against his. Then Evan moved, opening his mouth just slightly and Jonathan, being caught up in his fantasy, flicked his tongue out and slipped it past Evan's and he couldn't stop his fingers from curling in his hair.

He waited for Evan to break it off but instead the man dug his fingers into his hips, pulling at his shirt and wrapping his feet around the backs his knees. Jonathan took it greedily and pressed him into the back of his seat letting a hand slide up his thigh hearing Evan suck in a breath the further he went up, pressing his thumb into the crease of his jeans. Evan was arching up against him and slipping his hands up his shirt and Jonathan was losing it. He pulled off and sucked in air like he'd been drowning. And he had been. Drowning in Evan and the way he was looking up at him with lust blown eyes.

Evan chased his lips and the scent of peach schnapps and Jonathan grabbed at his ass, lifting him and spinning until he had him pressed against the wall. He couldn't get close enough and Evan let out a spine-tingling moan when Jonathan ran his teeth across his throat and he almost dropped him. Evan never wanted anything else but those massive hands holding him up and dragging over his skin. He didn't want anything or anyone else because this was the person that made him feel what he needed to feel, night and day. Just one look, one kiss, and he was done. Dead set on Delirious being the anchor he'd always searched for in a sea of endless faces and fears. He was his and he'd never need another.

"I've never come in my jeans before." Jonathan said in a rush as he ground himself against Evan who was pushing back just as hard, already feeling on edge from the friction.

"There's a first time for everything." He said and bit back another moan when Delirious bit down on his shoulder. "Couch. Now."

Jonathan stumbled on shaky legs over to the sofa, falling on his back with Evan straddling him. They pulled their shirts off and slung them into oblivion before Evan leaned down and caught his lips again rocking his hips down on his. He couldn't control himself and it was the most freeing feeling he'd ever had.

Delirious was close, he was losing his breath so Evan sat up and rolled his hips as hard as he could with his hands on Jonathan's chest making him produce sounds he'd never forget as long as he lived. He unbuttoned his jeans and slipped a hand in fitting it tight against his dick and rubbing in time with the moving of his hips and just as Jonathan threw his head back, he felt his muscles draw in and release sending the filthiest orgasm he'd ever had rolling through him.

Jonathan fingers were digging painfully into his thighs as he caught his breath but Evan couldn't feel any of it, just the laugh that came up his throat and into the room. Delirious giggled and propped himself up on his elbows, "I was going to buy you dinner first, but I guess we can do it out of order."

Evan smiled and kissed him soft and slow, "We can do it whatever way we want. That's how we usually roll. No need to change now."

Jonathan wrapped his arms around him and rolled them until he was laid out on top of him with his head buried in his neck. "I should probably go, it's like, two in the morning now."

"Oh, so you're the type that likes to come and go?"

"No." Jonathan grinned. "I'm the type that doesn't stay if they're not invited."

Evan smiled, "You can stay with me. You don't have to leave. I don't want you to."

So Jonathan stayed, canceled his hotel room, and spent the next week with Evan. Chaos ensued. They went on a hunt for the most epic shower curtain in L.A. because someone had ripped Evan's that fateful night, then they spent two days on the beach in San Diego with their toes in the sand, riding the ferris wheel until the stars came out and they couldn't tell which way was up or where their own lips began.

A week turned into two and Evan was asking him to move in to a new house with him before he could catch his tongue. A house was what he wanted long ago, but the apartment had been _her_ idea, along with the parties and socializing. But with Jonathan, a house they agreed on and he spent the next month flying back and forth across the country getting everything settled in. They lived in the shadows like he'd always intended, going to cons in secret hand in hand, snickering behind their friend's back as they crept up in surprise.

The happiness never faded and they both knew that it would be this way forever. No more trying to please everyone else, just each other, in the middle of the night, sometimes in public, definitely in the shower.

And they knew it would never end.


	4. 7 Minutes

Evan didn't know who's idea this was, but he was starting to wonder if he should just leave. The guys were getting crazy and the girls all looked way too tipsy. He hoped everyone had a hotel close by or a spot on the floor to crash at least. He'd only had two beers himself, so he wasn't worried. Parties weren't his forte. It wasn't Delirious' either, given the way he had holed himself up in the corner of the room with his bottle of Mike's.

"You guys! Come sit. We're spinning the bottle!" Brian hollered over the music about an hour later. Most of the people had filtered out of the house and what was left was their small group of guys and a handful of girls that he didn't know. He sat and watched Delirious push himself reluctantly from the wall and join them on the hardwood of Mini's apartment floor. They made eye contact and he grinned when Jonathan rolled his eyes dramatically with a smirk.

"Alright. This'll be kiss or closet. We spin and then flip a coin. Heads, you kiss. Tails, you get seven minutes in heaven." Brian winked at everyone and Evan felt his nerves twisting each time the bottle passed by. They played and laughed, watching a few girls kiss, clutching their stomachs when Nogla had to kiss Lui. It was a quick peck and Nogla put his face in his hands for the rest of the night.

It was all fun and games until he saw the bottle fall into Delirious' hands. Evan was alright, until he watched the bottle spin and spin and spin, watching it slow until it was pointing directly at himself. His heart knocked on his sternum and his eyes met Jonathan's.

Jonathan, who was looking just as nervous with his blue hoodie pulled up over his head. Evan could practically see his anxiety, the way he curled his fingers in and clenched his jaw.

"Flip the coin, Evan." Tyler said and everyone was staring him down and the anticipation was heavy in the room. Jonathan was watching the coin in his hand like his life depended on it. A kiss, Evan could do. He never had a problem giving a guy friend a drunk peck on the lips.

Evan flipped the coin in the air and it fell in slow motion until it hit his palm, he slapped it down on top of his other hand and he swallowed hard. He looked up at Jonathan again and listened to the claps and whistles around them, but they were muffled and all he saw was Delirious getting to his feet and holding a hand out to him.

It was tails. He swallowed down the rest of his drink and let Jonathan pulled him to his feet. Evan gave him an uncertain grin, "Come on, then."

Evan kept his hand in his and led him to Craig's dark room where the closet beckoned them with open doors and silent promises. Before he closed the door behind them he said, "You know, we don't have to actually do anything in here. It's just a game."

"I know. But you know they'll know we didn't."

Evan shrugged and pulled the doors to with a small click. "Then we can just kiss. No big deal."

Jonathan took a deep breath and cracked his knuckles, "Do you really want to? I mean, I've never even kissed a guy."

"I haven't kissed a guy either. Not a legit kiss, anyway." Evan rocked on his feet in the roomy closet.

"Okay." Jonathan laughed nervously. "I don't know what to do."

Evan smiled in the dark and moved a little closer. "Just be still."

He reached for him, his hand meeting a jacket and he felt his way up to his neck, his face and he could feel the heat rolling off of him. Now, if Evan said he hadn't thought about this he would be lying. He didn't think anyone could deny how mysterious Jonathan was or the fact that he hid his pretty face as much as he could beneath the shadow of his hoodie just made him even more attractive. He was very light skinned, red lipped, and pierced. Evan heard his breathing pick up and he felt his air rushing across his lips when he cupped his jaw and moved closer.

"Just relax." Evan whispered and pressed their lips together. He was soft and warm. No, he was hot and when Evan felt something wet, he took it as an invitation and flicked his tongue out across his mouth. Jonathan let out a breath and parted his lips and Evan didn't know when they both angled their faces, but they did and his tongue went deeper than he wanted it to. But he didn't have any regrets because Jonathan was sucking the spit from his tongue before latching onto his bottom lip. He'd never been kissed so thoroughly, so wet and so good.

Evan pulled back for a breath before diving back in and he let his hand slip beneath Jonathan's jacket, beneath his shirt. His stomach was smooth and hard. Jonathan's fingers slipped to his hair and pulled. That forced a groan from Evan's throat and he couldn't stop his hand from slipping around to his ass and grabbing.

Jonathan was nearly gasping for air and Evan was at his throat, kissing and licking and his fingers were opening the closet door. Then Jonathan was wrapped around his waist as Evan carried him to the bed and laid him down. He crawled up his lean body and his lips found his again, his hand finding it's way up his shirt once more. Jonathan was rocking his hips up and Evan was baring down and the friction was so fucking nice when they heard a knock on the door.

"Hey, lovebirds! It's been seven minutes!"

Evan shook his head with a grin, "Alright!"

He caught his breath and reached over to turn on the lamp in the room. He squinted against the light and Jonathan looked up at him, "What are you doing?"

"I just wanted to look at you." Evan said and he let his finger trace over his lips before he bent down and placed another kiss on them.

Jonathan grinned. "So . . . can we, like, continue this some other time?"

"Absolutely." Evan bit at his lip. "I'll take you to dinner first. How does that sound?"

"Sounds good." He smiled and snaked his fingers around his friend's neck, pulling him down into another wet kiss before he pulled back and said. "I'm really fucking glad my bottle landed on you."

Evan hummed, stood, and pulled Delirious to his feet. "You and me both."

 


	5. Wet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Omg, I hated this one so much idk why lol. I was such a horrid writer.

That smile was haunting. His lips wrapped around him. The heat of his mouth as he brought him closer and closer was almost unbearable.

"Evan, please." He gasped when he almost went over the edge. Evan looked up at him and hummed and Jonathan lost it, coming in his hot mouth, moaning as Evan kept going, never letting up until he was a shaking mess. "Fuck, Evan! Please!"

Jonathan couldn't breathe as the pleasure ran up his spine endlessly.

Then Evan was in his ear. "You like that?"

He nodded, "Mm."

"You like that, huh?" His voice was so deep and rich and sexy and Jonathan would never forget it. Ever since he heard it while they played Rainbow Six, he couldn't get it out of his head.

That had been weeks ago and this was the fifth time he'd dreamed about Evan sucking him off. He'd never had a gay dream before, let alone a wet one. But he woke up each time with ruined briefs and sweat on his skin.

So he let a dumb question slip when he was playing with Mini and Marcel one day. "Is it normal to have gay dreams about your friends?"

There was a worrying silence before Marcel cleared the air, "Yeah, dude. That's perfectly normal. I still have one every now and then even though I've been with Simone for years. It happens."

"Okay." Jonathan sighed and they resumed their game without any further hiccups. But again he went to sleep that night and dreamed of Evan's mouth for the millionth time and woke up very well pleased and more than a little disturbed. The fact that Evan wanted him to come visit him didn't make matters any better.

How was he supposed to look at him when all he would be thinking about were those lips, red and wrapped around his dick. His tongue so wet and warm, gliding like a fucking dream.

-

And there he was a few days later, walking off his plane into the airport, fingers cold and clammy with nerves. His heart hammered when he spotted him and that godforsaken smile just like he'd seen in his dream. "Sup, dork?"

"Hey, loser." Evan laughed and pulled him into a soft warm hug and Jonathan relished it. But his nerves grew even worse, because that dream was front and center in his brain and he couldn't will it away. It was there as they crawled into his car and talked. It was there when they got takeout and headed back to Evan's place where they were meeting the guys.

\--

Marcel and Craig were standing off to the side observing as their unmasked friend went around greeting everyone. "So, who do you think it was?"

Marcel glanced over at him, "I don't know, there's a lot of us. It could be anyone."

They watched as Jonathan smiled and laughed and then they watched it fade when he risked a glance over at Evan who was pulling down cups and plates in his kitchen. He looked away when Evan almost caught his eye.

Craig grinned and Marcel tried not to chuckle. "Of course it was Evan. Why would he have a gay dream about anyone else?"

\--

Evan was making a point to sit beside him and Jonathan didn't understand why. He knew that they were closer than everyone else and that they'd just met but he needed space because it was hot between them.

And every time Evan leaned over to tell him something in his ear, he fought back a shiver and dug his nails into his palms. His lips were close and they looked soft and ......

"You like that?" Evan said.

Jonathan swallowed and looked over at him chewing on a piece of gum with an eyebrow raised, like he knew exactly what he'd just said. Like he knew exactly how it made Jonathan feel.

" ... what?" He cleared his throat.

Evan fucking smirked and Jonathan saw his eyes give him a once over. "Do you like that? The shirt that I got you."

Jonathan blinked and looked down at the shirt that was sitting in his lap. He couldn't form words, all he could do was open and close his mouth again and try to breathe normally. "I ... yes, I do. Thank you ... sorry. Excuse me."

He stood and made his way around the guys, leaving Evan there confused. Or at least he thought. He was confused himself. He shut the bathroom door behind him and leaned against the sink, taking a deep breath.

Nothing like this had ever happened. He'd never been so hot over a dream, over something that wasn't even real. He'd never been so attracted to a guy, to Evan.

He was stiff in his jeans and he jumped when the door opened and Evan made his way in, closing it behind him with a quiet click. He moved in front of Jonathan where he stood with his back against the counter. He leaned in just a bit resting his hands on the marble on either side of his hips.

Jonathan licked his lips and said with just a slight shake to his voice, "Are you always this bold?"

Evan blew a bubble with his gum and let it pop. The watermelon sent filled their noses. "Why are you avoiding me?"

Jonathan really didn't want to answer and Evan was very close, their stomachs were almost flush against one another. He knew if he pressed any further he'd feel the embarrassment between his thighs.

"I'm not, I just ..."

Evan stretched his gum with his tongue and Jonathan lost his train of thought.

"Come on, spill it Delirious. You act like you've been thinking about me naked or something."

A blush ran across his face and Evan cocked his head to the side when Jonathan ducked his. "Is that it? You having wet dreams about me?"

Jonathan sucked in a breath when Evan pressed their hips together. "Yeah."

"Say it." Evan whispered darkly in his ear.

"I have wet dreams about you." Jonathan let his fingers curl around Evan's waist when he rocked into him. "Shit. So many times, I can't even look at you the same."

"Hm. My dreams are pretty wet, too." Evan hummed and sucked an earlobe between his lips, feeling the heat seeping into him as it rolled off Jonathan in waves. He pulled at the button of his jeans and heard a small whimper escape the man's lips.

He pulled back and caught his lips and it was wet and desperate just like his dreams always seemed to be. Jonathan breathing hot uneven breaths against him as they slid against each other. But this was real and Evan had other things in mind.

He pushed Jonathan down onto the toilet seat and pulled his jeans and briefs down in one fluid motion, watching the impressive erection sit freely upright against his stomach. "Evan, are you sure ab - holy shit ..."

Evan licked a line from the base to the tip and pushed the shirt up his stomach, before slipping his hand over Jonathan's mouth to keep him quiet. He groaned and moaned and squirmed around his hand when he swallowed him down in one go.

Jonathan threw his head back and threaded his hands through Evan's black hair, pulling harder when he really wanted to scream. It was just like his dream, but it was better, wetter, hotter.

And he was coming undone faster than he should have and he bit down on Evan's fingers when he slipped two into his mouth as he came. Evan didn't stop, wouldn't stop until Jonathan was empty and shaking, on the verge of tears he was so sated. "Evan ... "

"Come here." Evan said breathlessly and stood, his cock in his hands as he guided Jonathan's lips until the two met and he thrust into his mouth that felt like fire around him.

Jonathan sucked hard and kept up with the rocking of his hips until Evan's knees started to shake. Jonathan moaned around him, sending jolts of searing heat down his spine. Evan spilled, Jonathan felt it hit the back of his throat in waves. Evan gave one last hard thrust and then sank back onto the floor with his back against the tub catching his breath.

Jonathan was rubbing his face as he sat sprawled across the toilet seat. Then he started laughing and Evan cracked up when he caught his eye. "What?"

Jonathan wiped a tear from his eye as he giggled. "Can't believe we just did that, dude."

Evan ran a hand through his hair, "I know. That was awesome."

"I have dreamed about that for months and I woke up completely done every time. Fucking ridiculous." Jonathan sighed and worked his pants back up over his hips. "Your mouth ... is amazing."

"So is yours." Evan zipped his pants and pulled him in for a more calculated kiss and smiled. "I'm hungry again."

"For food? Or me?" Jonathan smirked.

Evan shrugged. "Both. But let's eat first and we'll do this again later. When everyone's gone and I don't have to keep you quiet."

Jonathan looped his finger through Evan's beltloop and whispered, "I can't wait."

When they opened the door and ventured back down the hall, the smile on Marcel's face told them that they weren't as quiet as they tried to be.

 


	6. Jelly

If there was one thing Evan was certain of it was that Delirious was his favorite. He didn't plan it that way and he sure as hell didn't want it to be true. But it was and he felt that ever present sting of jealousy when the guy would disappear for days to play with someone else. That someone else was Tyler this time.

They had both been uploading a shit load of Mortal Kombat X videos. Wildcat usually didn't get into those kind of games but Delirious had been insistent on him learning and playing with him and Cartoonz. So he did and Tyler actually really liked it. Mini joined in sometimes too. But Evan never did and Jonathan didn't bother him about it because he knew he didn't really play fighting games.

Delirious was having fun with it and Tyler actually started to come to him about it instead of the other way around for once. They grew closer than they ever had and it never crossed his mind that someone might get jealous or feel neglected because of it.

After a few days, Evan sent him an invite for some gmod and he hopped on board cheerfully and they played for hours it seemed like drowning themselves in laughter and their normal routine of fucking each other over repeatedly. All was well and Evan was laughing at Jonathan who couldn't stop laughing at the epic corpse launch he'd just done thanks to Evan's rocket. It was fine, until Tyler joined and he was like a moth and Delirious was the flame.

It set something off inside of Evan and he couldn't control the pure jealousy he felt coursing through him as he watched them be all buddy-buddy for the first time ever. He hated it. Delirious was his.

He stopped and sat back in his computer chair, taking his headset off and rubbing at his face. He couldn't believe he had thought that. _Delirious was his?_ Who did he think he was? Delirious was not his. Just a close friend that he enjoyed gaming with more than the others. Yeah.

"Evannnnn. Where did you go?" He heard Delirious' pitiful whining on the screen and sighed. Who the fuck was he kidding, because he wasn't kidding himself. He kind of liked him, like he had some sort of school girl crush on a guy he'd never even met, let alone seen. And here he was getting all jealous and possessive whenever someone else grabbed his attention.

"I'm gonna jump off this building, Vanoss! If you don't come back, I'll do it! I swear!" Delirious shouted and Evan smiled as he put his headset back on. That was what he liked to hear; Delirious threatening to do horrible things, begging Evan for help.

"Please don't do that, Delirious. I would be highly upset if my punching bag killed himself."

Jonathan erupted into a fit of giggles and Evan decided on something right then and there.

He was going to ask him.

He waited until they quit playing and everyone else had left the Skype call and he made the words come out. "Delirious?"

"Yeah?"

Evan twisted his fingers in his hand, "Can we meet?"

"Um." Jonathan was caught off guard. Evan sounded nervous and for the first time since he'd known him, he sounded a little bit desperate. "Why now?"

Evan bit his tongue, "I don't know, I've just been thinking about it a lot lately. About you."

Jonathan felt his heart beating faster and the blood rushing to his face and he felt like an idiot when all he could think of to say was. "Oh."

The silence was thick and Evan felt stupid, "I'm sorry. That was dumb. We don't have to, I know you don't want to. I just -"

"Evan." Jonathan cut him off. The Asian sighed, clearly flustered and nervous as hell. Jonathan found that ... cute? Evan was such a tough independent guy, it was odd to see him this way. And it was all because of him? That was even better and made the smile spread across his face. "Yes."

"Yes?" The hope was clear in Evan's voice.

Jonathan laughed, "Yes, you dork. We can meet."

Evan sighed so heavily it sounded like he was deflating.

"Listen, I just moved into my new house and I have so much shit everywhere, but you can come over whenever you want. I'll send you the address."

Evan's fingers were still trembling when he said, "Are you sure?"

"Don't make me change my mind, dude." Jonathan joked and Evan finally broke into a laugh.

**\------**

  
Jonathan completely forgot about Tyler, not that he ever stood a chance of taking Evan's place in his life. Evan was like a permanent ticking in his brain or a tattoo settled into his skin. He liked him there and as he sat on his couch waiting for him to show, he bounced his leg. His nerves were in knots and he pushed his jacket sleeves up his arms trying to relax. But when there was a knock at his door he felt his heart and his stomach in his throat and the possibility of relaxing was out the window.

"Shit." He stood and paced for a minute trying to collect himself. He bit his lips and Evan knocked again. "Okay, okay, okay. Just do it. Open the fucking door."

He turned the knob and cracked the door peering out, feeling better once he saw how scared Evan looked.

And fine. He was hella fine in that tight black shirt. Jonathan exhaled and opened the door fully, grinning at the nervous Asian in front of him. "Hi."

Evan tried to speak but he was still gaping at Jonathan's face. Blue eyes that were bright and clear and kind of intimidating. A sharp jaw and cheek bones for days. Hair that he could run his fingers through and ...

"Hey." He finally got out. "Sorry. I'm so nervous and I'm making this awkward. God, you're pretty. Why are you so pretty, dude?"

Delirious shrugged and cracked a smile, "I dunno. Ask my parents."

Jonathan moved and coaxed Evan inside and shut the door behind them and he knew Evan was too nervous to do it. Hell, he was almost too scared to do it himself but he did. He pulled at his arm until he was facing him and wrapped him up in a warm hug that felt like the end of his life. He was hot with worry and Jonathan could feel the tension in his body starting to ease off and Evan hugged him back with a ferocity that surprised them both.

The longer the hug lasted the more if felt like they were just holding each other together. Evan knew then that he had a deeper attachment than what met the eye.

And Jonathan knew he had fallen face first into the floor for this man. He'd always known he couldn't stop crushing on him no matter how many people he dated or how hard he tried not to think about him. Just thinking about him with anyone else made his chest swell with jealousy.

When they finally pulled apart they were both relaxed and just a tad pink in the face and they snorted with laughter at how stupid they were.

**\------**

  
A few hours and three pizzas later, Jonathan was throwing some spare swim shorts at his friend and leading him to his new outdoor pool.

Evan wasn't so sure. "Isn't it going to be freezing? It's like, sixty degrees out here."

"Yeah. It was the other day. But it's a heated pool and I didn't have it set up then." Jonathan grinned up at him, the light of the pool reflected in his eyes and Evan stared like an idiot. He followed him into the warm pool and they swam circles around each other while they laughed and talked about everything from shoes to stars, to how ugly Hillary Clinton was.

And when midnight rolled around Jonathan couldn't keep his curiosity contained any longer. "What really made you want to see me?"

Evan cut his eyes over at him, caught off guard by the question and he didn't need to say anything. Jonathan knew by the way he struggled to find an excuse.

"Oh my god, you were getting jealous weren't you?" He threw his head back and laughed and Evan denied it as soon as he found his voice. But when Jonathan raised an accusing brow at him, grinning, Evan couldn't lie.

"Okay, yeah. I got a little jealous."

Delirious motioned around them, "You came all the way to my house, I'd say you were more than just a little jealous. Sounds like you're extremely jealous. Am I wrong?"

Jonathan waited and Evan let his eyes rake over his fit body where he stood waist deep in the pool. He knew he was caught. So he tore his eyes away and sat on the steps, ashamed.

"Hey, it's okay to be jelly." Jonathan hummed and moved his way, coming to stand in front of him and placing his hands on Evan's knees.

Evan shook his head, "I'm sorry. I just really don't like it when you run off and have fun with someone else."

Delirious moved even closer, feeling pretty confident about what this was that they had going on between them. He fit himself between Evan's legs and locked eyes with him when Evan's hands fell around his waist. "I always come back to you, don't I?"

Evan nodded and inhaled as Jonathan ran his finger through his wet hair. Evan watched the water trail down his torso and slip beneath his shorts. He looked back up and felt the heat rising. "Yeah, you do."

"That kind of makes me yours." Jonathan whispered and crawled into his lap. He could see the pulse in the other man's neck. "But only if you want me to be."

"You have no idea." Evan breathed and Jonathan leaned in the extra inch and kissed him, tasting the chlorine water on his lips. Evan pulled him close, gripping his hips and digging his fingers into his ass as his tongue slipped past Jonathan's.

Delirious' hands were in his hair and he pulled back for a breath when Evan rolled his hips up against his. "Hey, slow down. I'm not going anywhere, I promise."

"Hm. I know you're not."

Jonathan sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and pulled off with a sinister smile. "Oh, do you now?"

"Yes, because you're gonna be beneath me soon with no where to go." Evan kissed at his collar bone and bit down, earning him a small groan and fingers sinking into his skin.

Jonathan watched his breath make goosebumps form on Evan's skin. "Show me."

So Evan did. He led him through the new house, their footsteps echoing around the empty rooms until they found the bedroom.

And just as Evan pulled the wet shorts from their bodies, Jonathan's phone buzzed.

"Who is it?"

Delirious held back a laugh, "Tyler. He wants to know if I want to play some MK."

Evan glared at the phone in his hand, "I think you have better things to do."

"You're damn right I do." Jonathan licked his lips, ignored the message all together, and was grateful he hadn't put his mattress on his bed frame yet because he would've had to buy a new one.


	7. Joke's on You

"Evan?" Jonathan called when he stepped into the quiet apartment. The silence was unsettling like it had been all month since October started. It usually meant Evan had set up some elaborate prank to scare the absolute shit out of him. So, needless to say, Jonathan tiptoed as quietly as he could across the wood floor. He tried to turn the lights on but Evan had clearly switched them off on the breaker box, like an asshole.

"You fucker." Jonathan sighed and accepted his defeat, letting his footsteps be heard as he walked down the hall to his bedroom. He had to pass Evan's on the way and he was expecting him to grab him when he walked past the open door but he didn't. That only made the anticipation worse and he could feel the hairs standing up on the back of his neck.

He heard the floor creak behind him in the dark and he turned to find a tall figure in a blue jacket and Jason mask. They made eye contact before the figure bolted and ran straight at him.

Pure dread ran down his spine, then up his throat as he screamed. His feet started working and he ran for his room, slamming the door open but it didn't matter because he had nowhere to run and strong hands were wrapping around him, sending them both onto his bed where he kicked and flailed.

"Get off!" He yelled but the guy was strong and had him pinned to the bed, holding his arms down and straddling his waist. He felt so constricted and he knew he was going to panic soon, but then the man laughed.

Evan laughed harder than he ever had and Jonathan rolled his eyes so hard it hurt. The anger swelled and he yanked his arms free.

"You are such a fucking asshole, Evan!" Jonathan yelled and Evan cut his laughter off when the seriousness washed over the room. "I could've killed you!"

"It was just a joke." Evan said, still sitting in his lap. He moved, sliding off the side of the bed. He tried to help Delirious up but the man refused and huffed as he left the room and opened the breaker box in the hall, turning the lights back on.

"Delirious, dude, it wasn't even that scary. Not like how you got me last week with those fucking fake spiders in my bed." Evan pulled the mask up and let it rest on his head. "Look, I'm sorry alright? If I had known it was going to freak you out that much, I wouldn't have done it. Okay?"

Jonathan leaned against the bar in the kitchen and ran his hands through his hair, still trying not to panic with the anger that was still there. "I just want you to be terrified, I want you feel what I do every fucking time you scare me! I feel like I'm going to die and then I get so fucking angry because it's literally the worst feeling in the world! I want you to feel that! I want you to feel as angry as I do right now!"

Evan rolled his eyes this time, "You can't make me angry. Scared? Definitely. But not angry. You've never made me angry."

Jonathan snapped his head up and reached across the bar for Evan's face and pulled him damn near over it toward him. The surprise was very clear on the asian's face and he didn't know what to do. It happened fast and before he could respond to the situation, there were rough lips on his and fingers pulling at his hair.

He finally reacted, opening his eyes finding blue ones staring right back at him. Evan grabbed his fingers and pried him off, shoving him away and wiping at his mouth when he was back on his feet.

"How about now, you dick?" Jonathan crossed him arms and waited. He watched Evan's brows furrow and his breathing become uneven the longer they stared at each other.

Then Evan moved around the bar with an angry flame in his eyes and for a moment Jonathan thought he had actually done it. He thought Evan was about to lay him out on the floor with a punch, but instead he grabbed a fist full of his shirt and said menacingly, "Joke's on you, asshole. I've been waiting on you to do that the entire year we've been living together."

Then Evan yanked him forward until their lips met harshly, teeth clashing, skin breaking as their tongues invaded each other's mouths.

Their lips were wet with each other's spit and Jonathan had them both moving toward the living room where he fell to the couch. Evan quickly sank down onto his lap, his mouth searching for his again like a magnet.

Jonathan fingers found their way beneath his shirt and then it was skin on skin, his hot hands gripping his hips and slipping over the tight muscle of his back.

They pulled away for a breath and Jonathan looked at him through hooded eyes, "My jacket looks so fucking good on you."

Evan ran a thumb over his wet lips, "I've always wanted to see you in my red one. So why don't we get you out of these clothes and you can try it on." He plucked at the soft cotton on his chest and leaned in for another kiss. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." Jonathan breathed out and pulled Evan closer, the mask on his head was pushed even further back and neither one of them heard the door open. Their tongues sliding together, tasting, was their number one priority. Intruders be damned.

* * *

Mini walked out just as fast as he had walked in. "Don't go in there."

"Why?" Tyler raised a brow and the other guys waited for an answer.

"Oh you know, just Delirious is making out with himself. No big deal. And by making out with himself I mean Evan is dressed up as Delirious and is sitting in his lap with his tongue down his throat, but if you guys wanna go in -"

"No! No, no thanks we're good."

Brock pushed them aside, "I've gotta see this! Move!"

 

  
"You fucker." Jonathan sighed and accepted his defeat, letting his footsteps be heard as he walked down the hall to his bedroom. He had to pass Evan's on the way and he was expecting him to grab him when he walked past the open door but he didn't. That only made the anticipation worse and he could feel the hairs standing up on the back of his neck.

  
He heard the floor creak behind him in the dark and he turned to find a tall figure in a blue jacket and Jason mask. They made eye contact before the figure bolted and ran straight at him.

Pure dread ran down his spine, then up his throat as he screamed. His feet started working and he ran for his room, slamming the door open but it didn't matter because he had nowhere to run and strong hands were wrapping around him, sending them both onto his bed where he kicked and flailed.

"Get off!" He yelled but the guy was strong and had him pinned to the bed, holding his arms down and straddling his waist. He felt so constricted and he knew he was going to panic soon, but then the man laughed.

Evan laughed harder than he ever had and Jonathan rolled his eyes so hard it hurt. The anger swelled and he yanked his arms free.

"You are such a fucking asshole, Evan!" Jonathan yelled and Evan cut his laughter off when the seriousness washed over the room. "I could've killed you!"

"It was just a joke." Evan said, still sitting in his lap. He moved, sliding off the side of the bed. He tried to help Delirious up but the man refused and huffed as he left the room and opened the breaker box in the hall, turning the lights back on.

"Delirious, dude, it wasn't even that scary. Not like how you got me last week with those fucking fake spiders in my bed." Evan pulled the mask up and let it rest on his head. "Look, I'm sorry alright? If I had known it was going to freak you out that much, I wouldn't have done it. Okay?"

Jonathan leaned against the bar in the kitchen and ran his hands through his hair, still trying not to panic with the anger that was still there. "I just want you to be terrified, I want you feel what I do every fucking time you scare me! I feel like I'm going to die and then I get so fucking angry because it's literally the worst feeling in the world! I want you to feel that! I want you to feel as angry as I do right now!"

Evan rolled his eyes this time, "You can't make me angry. Scared? Definitely. But not angry. You've never made me angry."

Jonathan snapped his head up and reached across the bar for Evan's face and pulled him damn near over it toward him. The surprise was very clear on the asian's face and he didn't know what to do. It happened fast and before he could respond to the situation, there were rough lips on his and fingers pulling at his hair.

He finally reacted, opening his eyes finding blue ones staring right back at him. Evan grabbed his fingers and pried him off, shoving him away and wiping at his mouth when he was back on his feet.

"How about now, you dick?" Jonathan crossed him arms and waited. He watched Evan's brows furrow and his breathing become uneven the longer they stared at each other.

Then Evan moved around the bar with an angry flame in his eyes and for a moment Jonathan thought he had actually done it. He thought Evan was about to lay him out on the floor with a punch, but instead he grabbed a fist full of his shirt and said menacingly, "Joke's on you, asshole. I've been waiting on you to do that the entire year we've been living together."

Then Evan yanked him forward until their lips met harshly, teeth clashing, skin breaking as their tongues invaded each other's mouths.

Their lips were wet with each other's spit and Jonathan had them both moving toward the living room where he fell to the couch. Evan quickly sank down onto his lap, his mouth searching for his again like a magnet.

Jonathan fingers found their way beneath his shirt and then it was skin on skin, his hot hands gripping his hips and slipping over the tight muscle of his back.

They pulled away for a breath and Jonathan looked at him through hooded eyes, "My jacket looks so fucking good on you."

Evan ran a thumb over his wet lips, "I've always wanted to see you in my red one. So why don't we get you out of these clothes and you can try it on." He plucked at the soft cotton on his chest and leaned in for another kiss. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." Jonathan breathed out and pulled Evan closer, the mask on his head was pushed even further back and neither one of them heard the door open. Their tongues sliding together, tasting, was their number one priority. Intruders be damned.

**\------**

  
Mini walked out just as fast as he had walked in. "Don't go in there."

"Why?" Tyler raised a brow and the other guys waited for an answer.

"Oh you know, just Delirious is making out with himself. No big deal. And by making out with himself I mean Evan is dressed up as Delirious and is sitting in his lap with his tongue down his throat, but if you guys wanna go in -"

"No! No, no thanks we're good."

Brock pushed them aside, "I've gotta see this! Move!"


	8. Trigger (Gang AU)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'll add Sofa King (Gang AU at the end of this one).

Everyone had a trigger and it was only a matter of time before you stumbled upon it, accidentally or intentionally.

And once that said trigger was found, you got to see a side of that person you've never seen before. Whether it's anger, laughter, pleasure, or just a blank stare.

Everyone had something that set them off, calmed them down, or did something else entirely and Evan was about to learn a very valuable piece of information concerning his blue eyed friend.

He knew most of the crew's triggers. For Craig it was the sound of other people eating and it made him want to murder, consequences be damned. For Brock, it was the sound of metal scraping a plate or someone sharpening a knife, it made him sick to his stomach. For Tyler, it was the word 'moist', it made him cringe. For Lui, it was whenever Nogla pursed his lips, it made him laugh no matter where they were or what situation they were in. Nogla's trigger on the other hand was Lui's lack of personal space. It calmed him in ways nothing else could. So they were found more often than not, sitting shoulder to shoulder.

For Brian, it was hearing a certain song. It made him get lost in his thoughts for hours. And for Luke it was hearing Jonathan laugh. Nothing made his day better than listening to him giggle, knowing something had made him happy. It put him at ease.

Evan didn't know what his trigger was. Nothing had ever made him snap or completely lose his train of thought.

And for Jonathan, he didn't know his trigger either and he'd never bothered to ask. Perhaps he didn't have one. He'd never given it much thought, but when he did it was while he was sitting on the counter by the bar taking his pistol apart piece by piece, setting them out on an old dirty rag. The smell of metal and grease filled his nose and not a minute later, Jonathan wandered into the kitchen searching for water.

He didn't look at Evan but he was breathless, breathing heavily from his nose. Evan watched him closely as the sweat ran down his shirtless back and he felt the warmth in his belly.

Jonathan had taken to running a few miles when he had a lot on his mind and needed to get out for while. Evan joined him occasionally, but only if he asked him to. When he did they usually came home and went straight for the bedroom and blew off their leftover energy in the sheets or in the shower.

He always ran late in the evening as the sun was dropping so the temperature was cooler and he wouldn't have a heat stroke on the side of the road. So the fact that he was standing in the kitchen sweating at almost eight o'clock in the evening, didn't surprise Evan at all.

"How was your run?" He asked and Jonathan paused to swallow his water. He shrugged and dug around in the refrigerator for something to munch on.

"Mm, I got a few whistles. Oh, and I saw a chicken crossing the road." Jonathan giggled to himself and heard Nogla walk into the kitchen behind him.

"Wha, and you didn't catch it? We could've had it for eatin'." Daithi said seriously and reached around him to get two beers from the fridge.

Jonathan laughed, "Maybe next time. I don't know how I feel about you gracing us with another one of your hometown recipes tonight."

"Lui likes my recipes."

Evan held back a laugh, "Lui doesn't want to hurt your feelings."

"Whatever. Ye fucks." With a roll of his eyes Nogla turned and left.

Jonathan finally looked over at him sitting there with grease all over his fingers and he nearly choked on his air. He felt the heat engulf his entire body and he tried to will it away but his fingers were becoming restless and his train of thought was derailing. Evan paid him no mind and kept looking down the barrel of his gun, sliding the small metal stick with a cloth tip on the end of it through the small opening. In and out, over and over, until it was cleaner than one of their crime scenes.

Jonathan slowly shuffled forward, feeling new sweat beading against his skin and when his hands hit the counter, straining and splayed out against the cold marble, Evan finally looked up at him. A look Jonathan was very unfamiliar with spread across Evan's face. He didn't know what to call it but as he moved around the bar he could see the pulse in Evan's neck fluttering wildly.

Jonathan had never felt like this before, like he was ferrel and couldn't control himself or the hunger clawing at the end of his fingertips. The craving to just tear into Evan and make him scream.

He stopped behind the Asian and for once in his life he felt dominance run through him. Evan had stopped cleaning the metal and Jonathan watched the goosebumps rise on his skin when he leaned down a whispered in his ear, "Keep going."

Evan obeyed, letting his fingers continue their smooth dance as he slowly wiped his pistol down until there wasn't a spec of dust left on it. He felt himself trembling and Jonathan's nose was touching the back of his neck, his tongue ghosting over his skin. This was new and he was burning when he felt his teeth latch onto the sensitive skin between his neck and shoulder. Evan had never felt so weak, like he was losing breath and his control on the situation. He gripped the edge of the marble in front of him, bracing himself when Jonathan pressed himself against him as he leaned forward to catch his jaw in his fingers. He pulled at Evan's face until he was looking up, giving him access to the expanse of neck that had always been his favourite. His teeth grazed the apple of his throat and he heard Evan groan when he let his hand travel down his bare chest, his nails paying no mind to what they scratched.

Jonathan had never seen him breathless like this. It made the heat pool a little faster, his hunger getting unbearable and he found himself pushing Evan flat against the bar, placing chaste kisses against his tan back. He watched the muscles stretch and pull beneath his skin as he shook beneath his touch and Jonathan had never felt so fucking alive.

The sounds that Evan was letting slip from his mouth were driving him up the fucking wall. The short breaths, the small moans as Jonathan nipped at his skin and slipped a hand beneath his loose shorts letting his fingers slide roughly against the soft skin of his stiff cock.

"Shit . . ."

Jonathan grinned and shoved Evan's shorts down and let his own sweatpants fall past his knees, letting his own erection rest against Evan's perfect ass. Evan pushed back against him and it was such an elating feeling. The feeling of Evan on the opposite side, the receiving end, practically begging for it. Jonathan shoved him back against the counter and he saw the grin spread across the side of his boss' face. He watched his fingers reach for the glass bottle on the bar that was just out of reach.

Jonathan swatted his hand away and grabbed it himself, pouring a bit of the olive oil on his fingers, pressing his fingers slightly against Evan's hole. "Relax."

He waited until Evan went slack with his face flat against the cold marble. Jonathan kept a firm hand on Evan's cock, rubbing him slowly in time with his finger that had slipped in. He worked him until he could slip another one in, faltering when Evan gave a small gasp and rocked back against him. Jonathan squeezed him tighter, pressed into him further feeling his muscles relaxing, accepting him, and when his long fingers prodded far enough Evan let out a noise that Jonathan didn't know he could produce.

"Holy fucking hell just fuck me!" He yelled out and pushed back against him hard. Jonathan was on the verge of losing it, but he needed this to last just a bit longer. And for this to be his first time the other way around, he wanted to witness it.

He leaned down against his ear, rubbing his palm over the head of Evan's cock and he was whimpering, gasping for air like he'd just run ten miles in two minutes. "Is this what you want?"

Evan scrunched his brows and nodded furiously when Jonathan lined himself up. "Yeah . . . fuck yes."

"Never though I'd hear you say that."

Evan gave a breathless laugh, "Me either. Ah! Jesus, Jonathan."

He pushed just the tip in, letting Evan's body adjust since Jonathan was almost positive he'd never been fucked in his life. Not with his alpha attitude and built physique.

"Shh. Just relax." He stood tall and gripped Evan's hips and he rocked his own until he was halfway inside of him. Evan was so tight and so hot he felt like fire.

"God . . . ahh . . . fuck." Evan was a moaning mess below him and when Jonathan sank himself to the hilt neither one of them could breathe.

"Come on." Evan moved his hips and Jonathan stilled him, his fingers gripped his waist as he caught his breath.

"Evan." He said and pulled him up, turning his face so he could kiss him, their tongues wet as they slid.

He rolled back against him and Jonathan couldn't take it anymore. He slammed him back down onto the marble and thrust his hips hard, pulling out and sinking all the way down into him in one fluid motion. He earned a cry from the man and he reached around him to take his cock in his hand again.

"I'm going to fuck you until you can't walk without your knees buckling beneath you." Jonathan said and sank his teeth into his neck, his hips snapping, and Evan was trembling.

"Oh, fuck!" Evan arched his back when Jonathan hit it, that one spot that he'd never experienced before. "My God, what is that?!"

Jonathan fisted his hair in his other hand and pulled Evan's head back to mouth at his jaw. "That's the best thing that your body has to offer. Do you want it?"

"Hah, fucking Christ! Yes!"

Jonathan was so deep inside of him he thought he might just stay there. He'd never felt anything so good in his life. He never thought Evan would be crying his name, thrusting himself back onto his dick begging him for more.

Evan brought one of his legs up onto the stool beside him and Jonathan felt himself go even deeper, further, if it was even possible.

"That is so fucking good." Evan was shaking, tremors running across his body as Jonathan hit that spot with each jerk of his perfect hips, his hand still stroking him in time with it. And just as soon as he thought he was going to fall over the edge, Jonathan pulled out and yanked Evan with him to the coffee table in the living room. He fell to it and smirked up at Evan, his blue eyes raking over his flushed skin and wobbly legs.

"Get down here and ride me."

Evan wasted no time and Jonathan watched as his lover crawled eagerly onto his lap, slipping smoothly down onto him, crouching above him using his pure muscle to lift himself up and off and back down into his length. Jonathan was fascinated watching Evan, the ecstasy that was spreading across his face as he let himself be fucked for the first time. Jonathan stilled him, found leverage with his feet and rolled his hips up listening to Evan's cries become more high pitched and desperate the harder he hit his prostate.

"Fuck, Jonathan! Ah, fuck me!" He moaned like a bitch but he didn't care, it was so good and Jonathan was holding him in his lap, snapping his hips, fucking him like he'd never get to again. "Harder! Harder! Yeah . . . fuck yeah! Right there! Oh my fucking god . . ."

Jonathan reached up for his hair, yanking as he called his name. Evan came, his heat sticking to Jonathan's chest in thick strings. It rolled through them both and Evan felt Jonathan release, his red lips hanging open until he fell back onto the wood breathless.

"Wow."

Evan smiled, laughing as he leaned down to place a hot kiss against his mouth. "I guess I need to clean my gun more often."

They laid there forever, running their fingers over each other's skin, laughing about it. And when Evan stood he found out Jonathan had been true to his word because he couldn't walk without his knees buckling.

He'd never forget that night. The night he discovered Jonathan's trigger which was the sight of him cleaning his gun. It made him light like a match and tear into him.

So on the days that he could feel Jonathan eyeing him, undressing him with his eyes, he'd bring his pistol to bed and take it apart piece by piece as slowly as he could until Jonathan was forcing himself to sit still, stay calm, holding himself back from ripping Evan's clothes from his body. It made Evan feel vulnerable and he loved the anticipation he felt when he pieced the gun back together because he knew that when the last part clicked . . . he was prey and Jonathan would have him any way he wanted; fast and hard. That turned Evan on more than anything and that was the night he discovered his own trigger. Being the Omega.

* * *

 

SOFA KING: GANG AU

Evan was walking around in his sweatpants after he finished his workout with Brock and he was wandering past the kitchen into the living room.

Jonathan and most of the boys were piled up on the couch watching old reruns of Lost, shoving popcorn in their mouths as they passed the bowl around.

Evan silently walked over to the back of the sofa and flicked Jonathan on the ear. He smiled when he flinched and swatted him away.

"Cut it out." Jonathan mumbled before he turned his attention back to the television. He wasn't wearing his jacket and Evan loved it when he didn't. He loved seeing him in a tight white shirt that hugged his every muscle, a shirt that showed just how lean and fit he really was. It was sexy and Evan could see the tendons in his neck as he turned back to glare at him when he flicked him in the ear again.

"Evan, I swear. Do it one more time. I dare you." He said and Evan, being in a rare playful mood, did it again.

Luke kicked the coffee table so it slid to the other side of the room just in time as Jonathan caught Evan's arm and pulled him over the back of the couch.

He flipped over the sofa and rolled into the floor, pulling Jonathan down with him, laughing his ass off as everyone jumped at the sudden struggle in front of them.

"Ow! You asshole!" Jonathan yelled and rolled on top of Evan who was lying beneath him looking a little smug with himself. Up until Jonathan started poking him in his ticklish spot, then he got serious.

"No." Evan grabbed his wrist, but Jonathan used his other hand to tickle him again. Evan couldn't help but laugh. "Please, don't!"

Lui leaned over and said to Nogla, "Wanna place bets?"

"Bets? Did I hear bets?" Mini sat up.  
Everyone looked around as the two grown men rolled and struggled against each other on the hardwood floor.

"You are fucking cheating!"

"How am I cheating!? It's not my fault you're so ticklish!" Jonathan said and grabbed Evan hard in his ribs and he thought the man was going to suffocate himself. He was laughing but it was so hard it was silent.

"This is weird." Brian said and glanced around. "Does anyone else feel weird watching this?"

Everyone gave a collective, "Yes."

Luke chuckled, "We just haven't seen them play with each other."

Lui snorted. "Wow, Toonz."

"Yeah that didn't sound the way I wanted it to." Luke laughed.

Brian stood and dusted the popcorn remains from his jeans. "Well, boys. I'm going to vacate the premises before things get heated between them. I can see it coming from a mile away. I'd rather not see it at all so, I'm gonna hit the pool."

Brian wasn't wrong because two minutes after he left, Evan finally got the upper hand and rolled Jonathan over. He proceeded to bury his face in his neck and things became heated faster than he planned. He rolled his hips down on him and Jonathan slid his hands down into Evan's sweatpants, grabbing at his ass. That's when the audience quickly got to their feet.

"Alright, yep, we'll see you guys down at the pool." Mini said and sped out of the room with Nogla hot on his heels.

Luke stood and held out a hand for Lui and pulled him to his feet. "You guys know where to find us. No rush, take your time."

They didn't get a reply, just a laugh from Jonathan when Evan tried to pull his shirt over his head and it got stuck. When he finally did Evan leaned down and caught his lips, silencing his giggles.

"Jesus, they are seriously about to fuck on the living room floor." Lui shook his head.

Luke just laughed as they made their way down the stairs and onto the deck where everyone else was already stripping down to their shorts.

Back upstairs Jonathan was smiling against his lover's lips as he pushed the sweatpants down the firm muscles of his legs. Evan was kissing the soft skin of his neck and collar bone, sending heat directly where it needed to go.

"There's lube under the couch." Jonathan said and shook his head when Evan sat up and raised a confused brow at him. "Don't ask why. Just get it."

Jonathan lifted his hips and let Evan yank his jeans and briefs off before he settled on top of him again, slicking his fingers and immediately pushing in, earning him a sweet sound of surprise.

"Tell me where." Evan whispered hotly in his ear as his long fingers prodded and searched. Jonathan was breathing heavily and pushing down on him trying to aid him in his indeavor.

He was fighting back the fire from just feeling Jonathan squirming on his fingers and he clamped down on his neck when he felt Jonathan's muscles tighten around him. His back arched off the floor and he nearly screamed.

"There!"

Jonathan dug his nails into Evan's skin as he kept pressure on that one spot, rubbing, teasing, driving him to the fucking edge without laying a hand on his cock.

"Holy fuck ... Evan."

Evan pulled his fingers away and he stood, pulling Jonathan up with him. He fell back onto the couch and looked up at his blue eyes and grinned. "Ride me."

Jonathan wet his lips while he watched Evan slick himself up and then he crawled onto the couch wasting no time lining himself up and sinking down onto him. Evan's hands gripped his waist and he moved his hips, helping him start a smooth and steady rhythm that had him brushing that spot again.

He had Jonathan panting, rocking himself to orgasm while he stroked him through it.

"That's so fucking good ..." Jonathan gasped. Evan pulled him down for a deep kiss, pulling at his short hair and nipping at his tongue. He pushed Jonathan down onto his cock again, this time roughly and Jonathan cried out again.

Evan pulled him close and let his muscles finally coil, until he felt his climax hit him as Jonathan rode him through it. Until he was sated and empty.

He couldn't fucking breathe. "My God ..."

"Yeah." Jonathan heaved and fell against him. They were both slick with sweat and Jonathan lifted his head when he heard a door open. He watched Marcel throw car keys on the kitchen counter and open the fridge. He gulped down half a bottle of water before he looked over and caught his eye.

Jonathan broke into a grin and Evan started laughing beneath him.

"Are you fucking serious?!" Marcel yelled, shutting the refrigerator and storming off. "That's the third time I've walked in on you assholes!"

"Maybe you should just wear a blindfold from now on! You'll never see us again!" Jonathan called after him and they heard a faint, "Fuck you guys!"

"He'll get over it." Evan laughed and pulled Jonathan down for another kiss.

"Mm."

 


End file.
